If there is one thing I hate in The newest offensive adult metaphor comes out of Australia, where blogger Mia Freedman has kindly decided to introduce us to “Libido Fairies.” Yes, women have libido fairies apparently, although I’ve never been introduced to one, and all my lady partners have failed to mention this to me before.
According to Freedman, “female libido fairies have little in common with male libido fairies. This is probably because male libido fairies are not fairies, they are warriors. Almighty superhero warriors who wear full body armor, wield light sabres and have magic powers of resilience capable of withstanding virtually any threat.”
Oh yeah, man, my libido warrior is named Braveheart and wears a kilt and carries an, um, light sabre…in the Highlands…
Freedman goes on: “Female libido fairies however, can be fragile cretures. Really, they should live in a bubble. Possibly bubble wrap. Or at the very least, a carefully controlled ecosystem where they can be protected from the infinite number of seemingly innocuous things that can kill them. Like resentment.”
Do these fairies have magical xxx wands? Are they named Tinker Bell? Does Tinker Bell like chilling with Braveheart, or is she looking for more of a Peter Pan? Most importantly, where can I put my life saber?