Can You Turn Him Straight?

By the time an adult woman is in her late twenties, she has probably had the unfortunate luck of falling for a gay man at one point in her young life. It can be a devastating blow to the ego when somebody you’re in love with has told you they rather date men. You keep wondering how they were so good at sex and pleasing you constantly. You can even begin convincing yourself that this is just a phase they’re going through like a drunken college girl during her freshman year.

Unfortunately if you think you can turn your recent ex-boyfriend straight then you will be entering a world of pain and denial. Even if the object of your affections seems confused and harbors some feelings for you, it doesn’t mean they’re going to change their path to be with you and even if they do, it doesn’t mean it will be a genuine relationship either.

Letting go of an ex who reveals that he’s gay is far harder to do than any other ex. This is because deep down inside, you know there will never be a chance of reuniting. What’s even harder to deal with is the fact that deep down you already saw the signs ages ago and may have just been waiting for the other shoe to drop.

So if your boyfriend has come out of the closet, let him be free even if he’s scared to be out. If he is confused as to who he wants to be with, point him in the direction he needs to go to. Stop primping yourself up. Stop trying to make him jealous and if you can’t be around him without holding back tears, then let him know. It will be difficult, but it’s better to eventually have this person in your life as a great friend than having him shun for you for years to come because of your constant efforts to change him.

Be smart and be strong and give yourself time to heal. It’s only then you will be able to put this ordeal behind you and be able to find the right one for you in the long run.

Top Ten Sexy Scream Queens From 2011

I don’t know about you, but I felt like this year’s horror pickings were quite slim. 2011 has delivered some surprisingly adult horror remakes, mediocre slasher sequels and few spooky supernatural thrillers, but likely there were still plenty of sex pot scream queens to make men drool everywhere. Here is my list of the top ten sexy scream queens of this year that made it into many male horror fans’ spank banks:

10. Roxane Mesquida (Rubber)

Although Rubber premiered in film festivals last year, the killer tire didn’t become popular until this year with many horror film goers. Roxane spent most of the film running from a rubber tire and this French vixen is no stranger to sexy roles as she has made unforgettable and naked appearances in Gregg Araki’s KaBoom and the infamous Fat Girl.

9. Lauren Britten (Paranormal Activity 3)

Before last week, many of us had no idea who she was, but since starring in Paranormal Activity 3 as the doomed mother, many men have started to take notice of this sexy Karen Allen doppleganger. She is definitely an actress we will see more of in the future…hopefully without the 80′s hairdo though.

8. Sharni Vinson (You’re Next)

Although Sharni has been popular in Australia with her R&B singing career for years, she has only started becoming known in North America after her “breakthrough” role in Step Up 3-D. However, it is her new role in the latest horror indie You’re Next that is getting this new scream queen a lot of attention.

7. Jaime King (Mother’s Day)

Although the entire female cast should be recognized because all of them were drop dead gorgeous, Jaime King is probably the most successful Scream Queen of the bunch. Since doing The Tripper and My Bloody Valentine 3-D, Jaime is no stranger to the horror genre and knows how to master being terrified and looking pretty at the same time.

6. Imogen Poots (Fright Night)

Imogen Poots may be young, but she proved in this year’s remake to Fright Night that she had far more sex appeal than Amanda Bearse (which honestly is not a huge achievement) did in the original and I’m sure many horror geeks are looking forward to her next slasher role.

5. Rose Byrne (Insidious)

Rose Byrne has definitely proved she has A-list star power and although she made audience aff members laugh with her snotty role in Bridesmaids, she also managed to show off her good looks and her vocal chords in the supernatural thriller, Insidious.

4. Mary Elizabeth Winstead (The Thing)

This Canadian-loving American woman has been in plenty of horror films in her young career and now she is proving she has staying power by being in cast in “final girl” roles. Although she may be covered in The Thing, she is still as attractive as she was in Death Proof.

3. Hayden Panettiere (Scream 4)

The former Heroes star proved to fans everywhere that hot female horror geeks do exist when she played Kirby, the horror fanatic in Scream 4. Her short haircut and midriff tops definitely got a lot of attention and I have no doubt in my mind that she will be back in the next sequel.

2. Amber Heard (Drive Angry 3-D and The Ward)

Despite the fact that Amber Heard is openly gay, that doesn’t stop men from fantasizing about her 24/7 and they had plenty of Amber to see this year when she starred alongside Nicolas Cage in Drive Angry and battled the supernatural in John Carpenter’s The Ward.

1. Neve Campbell (Scream 4)

It was great to see Neve Campbell back in Ghostface action this year and even better to see this 38-year old beauty is still sporting her natural looks and has avoided the botox. Looking forward to the sequel and hopefully they make her the killer this time round.

Who Are Your Favorite Scream Queens from 2011? Comment Below!

Signs Your Co-Worker Is Into You

As we all know, office romances and flirting are common and majority of us have experienced mixing business with pleasure in our adult dating and career lives. If you want to know if a co-worker of the opposite sex is into you, here are some tell-tale signs:

1. They Always Have Their Eyes On You

Do you ever feel like somebody is consistently watching your computer monitor? Is it the same someone who always makes an excuse to come over to your desk and talk to you? If they seem like they are always listening to your conversations with others and if they look away when you actually pay attention to the, they definitely have a crush on you.

2. “Coincidental Run-ins”

When you go get coffee or even go the washroom, don’t be surprised to see the co-worker who likes you to go get coffee and take a bathroom break as well. These run-ins are not concidental, but merely they are excuses to talk to you privately if even for a couple of minutes.

3. No Eye Contact And Avoids You

The more intense this person’s feelings are for you, the more likely they will avoid you. They refuse to give you sufficient eye contact and will probably squirm when talking to you in front of other co-workers.

4. They Talk Incredibly Loud

No matter if your co-worker is a serene and quiet person, the second you come into the room, they will feel inclined to have you notice their witty personality and sense of humor. Everything they say is projected (even without their acknowledgement) and they are waiting for you to respond.

5. Always Go Out Of Their Way To Help You

If a co-worker likes you, they may feel seem extremely kind and try to help you on certain projects. It is not because they are doing this from the kindness of their hearts, but rather they want you to take notice of them.

6. They Take The Same Breaks You Do

They will go out of their way to take the same lunch break as you do. Sometimes they will message you when it’s time to go out on break. If you feel the need to apologize because you can’t go, then you should know how they feel about you.

7. Very Inquisitive About Your Love Life

If you are single, your co-worker may ask what you are doing on upcoming weekends, so you can hang out with them and their friends in a “nonchalant” way. However, if you are in a relationship, don’t be surprised to see them probe for snags in your relationship.

8. They Make Fun of You

Just like grade school, when somebody at work likes you, they tend to make fun of you more than compliment you. Sure, they may not pull your hair, but they will probably insult you every chance they get.

9. They Look Great

If you notice that your co-worker is wearing nice clothes and putting on their cologne before going to work, it’s most likely a tactic to get noticed.

10. None Stop Laughing and Smiling

Have you noticed that everytime you say something (even if it’s not particularly funny) your co-worker laughs and smiles? This is the most obvious sign they like you. Plain and simple.

Sex Acts From Horror Films You Should Stay Away From

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How To Disguise Your Walk Of Shame

After a great night of sex with a stranger, boyfriend or casual lover comes the much hated walk of shame. When it comes to our adult dating lives, walks of shames for women happen for more often than you would think. You don’t have to be a college student in a dormitory anymore to experience these embarrassing if not revealing walks.

However, there are ways to disguise your post-coital stroll home and here are a few simple ways on how to do so:

Big Purse

I know the clutches are pretty ladies, but they are not practical especially if you sense a late night hook up in the near future. You will need a bigger sized purse to have the following products on handy.

Eye Make-Up Remover

Saliva and toilet paper can only take off so much eyeliner, so be equipped with a reliable and gentle eye make-up remover to quickly get rid of raccoon/crackhead eyes.

Dentaburst Strips!

I know these toothbrush substitutes look like pantyliners for your fingers, however they do work wonders especially when your breath smells of morning funk, alcohol and stale cigarettes.

Dr. Scholl’s Flats For Her

If you don’t feel like walking around in your sequin-covered stilettos for your embarrassing walk home, rely on this compact black rubber flats to get you through. It also doesn’t hurt that they look fashionable as well.

Compact Hair Brush

You will need to tame your “I just got banged” disheveled hair and compact hair brushes are perfect when you are on the go. Purchase the ones with a compact mirror for last minute check ups as well.

Hipster Scarf

Typically, no one wants to walk around 8am in the morning wearing a plunging halter top from the night before. That is why having a big flowing scarf is essential to help you disguise your elaborate evening outfit from the night before.

Sunglasses

You most likely will be suffering a mild to a serious hangover the day after which is why you should always have a pair of shades on handy to prepare you for the sunny morning and to help hide your puffy eyes.

7 Dating Mistakes Women Make Daily

In order to attract the opposite sex, women go to certain lengths to impress a guy they want to start dating. However, there are certain fashion, beauty and conversation faux pas women consistently make and they do not go unnoticed by men either. If you’re wondering why your adult dating life is going the way you want, then maybe you should check the following list to see if you are committing any of these cardinal sins:

1. The Baby Voice

Why oh why do women find it sexy to put on a baby voice? Unless you have a reality show to secure, there is no need for any women to put on this voice for any man. When men hear this, we think you have severe daddy issues. Plain and simple.

2. Hair Extensions

There is nothing more unattractive than trying to kiss a girl for the first time and pulling out a track of hair extensions when trying to stroke her hair. Hair extensions are fine once in a while, but never wear them if you’re trying to attract a new guy. Your plan will fail miserably if you do.

3. Spray Tans

I want to know why women think men care about henna dyed skin on women. I think other women are the ones that comment on how hot they look. No man wants to date an oompa loompa. It literally frightens men when you change into a human mood ring that reeks for 24 hours.

4. Acting Like A Hilton

Contrary to popular belief, men actually like to DATE smart women. So stop twirling your hair and asking the waiter how they were able to get strands of hair from heaven when you order the angelhair pasta dish. Men want to bang dumb girls like that. They don’t want to date them.

5. Your Not So Skinny Jeans

Let’s face it: Skinny jeans are not for everyone. You can be a perfectly healthy girl with a great body, but sometimes those jeans make your butt crack show too much. Men don’t want to date women that look like they belong in a trailer park.

6. Draw in Eye Brows

Eyebrows are a very important feature on a woman’s face. It’s perfectly normal to over pluck one day, but when you’re filling out your eyebrows with what looks like Black Sharpie ink, it will totally repulse the man you are seeking to date.

7. Tarantula Lashes

God damn Drew Barrymore and those stupid Covergirl ads. She has deluded women everywhere that they can have perfect eye lashes without applying very expensive fake eye lashes on first. Please know that you only need a couple coats of mascara, ladies. Anything more and you’ll look like a spider is growing legs out of your eyelids.

Bring Us A Condom Variety Pack Already!

Dear Condom Manufacturers,

Thank you for your continued service of bringing pleasure to women by providing ribs, twists and sensations to your condom brands. It is much appreciated. However, I have a dilemma that is common with many single women who enjoy having sex with multiple partners. I need to do inventory on my condom supply. You may think this has a simple solution. You’re probably thinking, “Well bitch, just take your lazy ass to the pharmacy and buy some already.” I really wish it was as simple as that.

It’s not that I’m humiliated to buy them. I’ve been buying condoms without blushing since I was sixteen years old. (Daddy issues!) My problem is the lack of variety you put in your packs. If you’re an adult who is sexually active and you have multiple partners, it’s hard to decipher how “well endowed” some men are going to be. While single ladies like myself love buying the gold Trojan Magnum packs, those behemoth lovers are very far and few between. What happens when we pick up a Croatian guy at club that is hung like a thimble or what if we pick up an Irish “Average Joe?”

Let’s face the truth now. If I have a magnum sized pack of condoms and hand one over to a random guy I’m hooking up with, do you think he is going to like the fact that I sleep with men with gargantuan penises? I don’t think so. Do you think my ‘Tiny Tim’ will want to inflate his male ego by trying to do the deed with an oversized sheath over his male member? He probably would, but he would never stay erect.

I don’t want to purchase multiple boxes of condoms and look like a well-paid and worked prostitute at the pharmacy desk. I just want to buy my condoms like I buy my tampons: in a variety pack. Since all you condom manufacturers make your money from being inventive with flavored, tipped, ripped and long lasting condoms, why not put all of them in one pack? I don’t think it’s too much to ask for. It’s a simple request that would help many womens’ dating lives. Trust me.
P.S. Your spermicidal lubricant smells like crap. It’s not rocket science, people! Lube those condoms up with something else, please!

How To Keep Your Relationship Alive During The Holidays

The holiday season can be really tough on your adult dating life and your expectations. Often the holidays are times when relationship and sex problems become the most evident.

Everywhere we turn is pictures of “perfect” holiday celebrations; these pictures are on movies, commercials, television, in stores, etc. In all, there is a lot of pressure to make everything meaningful. It seems like if we are not like “everyone else”, then our relationships are flawed.

Here are some tips to help you get your relationships through the holidays:

Make time for yourself; try not to be so consumed with the stress of the season

Sometimes the anticipation of enjoying a holiday or a holiday event with someone is so strong that if our partner doesn’t respond as we think they should, our pleasure in the event is spoiled. Tying up your expectations too closely with another’s only leads to disappointments. If you need to, do some things on your own – don’t give away your pleasure in things you enjoy to someone else and their moods.

 Remember the holidays can be depressing
Whatever issues, failures and problems you have with your partner, remember that the holiday environment can make the lows much lower than other times of year. There’s enough anxiety and unrealistic expectations at this time of year to squelch even the most loving couple.

Lastly, here are some great communication tips for this time of year:
1. Hug your partner when you say “hello” and “goodbye”. It feels great and makes your partner feel loved.

2. Be polite to each other. Just because you are in a relationship doesn’t mean you can be rude.

3. When you ask your partner a question, make eye contact and listen to the answer. Show them that you are attentive and caring.

4. Make a list of your partner’s positive qualities. Share them and tell them why you think that they are true.

5. Respect each other’s private space. Over time, many couples let this slide. Especially during the holiday season when time is limited.

If you are thinking of ending your relationship, wait till the New Year to re-evaluate your situation. You will have a different perspective and may have averted a hasty decision. January represents renewal and rebirth- and that can also mean your relationship.

How To Spot a Stage 5 Clinger

So you just started dating a reasonable adult woman and are wondering if you are looking for a potential courtship or a casual dating relationship. There are many unattractive qualities about certain single men and women but nothing will turn you off more than a Stage 5 Clinger.

A stage 5 clinger is a term first used in the film Wedding Crashers and it is a person who gets far too clingy early on in a relationship. According to the Urban Dictionary, the definition of a Stage 5 clinger is ‘a member of the opposite sex that is likely to become overly attached, overly fast.

Getting overly attached to someone is fairly unhealthy, however it is even more unhealthy and even considerably dangerous for the other partner. There are certain red flags that you should consider before pursuing a relationship with somebody that exhibits the following qualities and behaviors.

Getting Jealous Far Too Soon

You just started dating this person and you’re out for a night on the town with them and your friends. You go to the bar and somebody asks you for a light. If your partner starts freaking out, throwing a drink in your face and preparing to fight over you, then you have a “Stage 5 clinger” on your hands.

Your Phone Becomes Your Worst Enemy

A stage 5 clinger will start messaging your cute texts at the beginning. You won’t feel alarmed until you start getting texts every 10 minutes. They’ll have a lot of LOLs and MISS U XOXO in every message. They’ll tell how much they’re thinking about you every hour on the hour. They constantly want to know what you’re doing and if you’re thinking of them…even if you’re sitting on the toilet. If you can put your phone on vibrate and could use it as a sex toy, then you have a clinger!

You’ve Been Tapped Googled

A clinger has a tendency to do their research on you and Google is their best friend. They start googling your name and finding any piece of information they can get on you. Suddenly they start talking about interests of yours that they have immediately adopted for their own and questioning who is with you in a picture and what your relationship to that person is.

They Treat You Like Elmyra

Your clinger will cling to you physically as well as emotionally. If they hug you and you feel like how Buster Bunny on Tiny Toons feels when being hugged by Elmyra, then you are in for trouble, my friend.

If you have no intention on working on this relationship, then get out now! Otherwise, prepare for a world of misery.

The Beginning of the End, Or the End of the Beginning

Once you’ve figured out how to attract women, you’re bound to find one who’s particularly interesting to you.

One that you might actually, um, love.

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One that you might want to keep around for a bit. Hey, you might even meet someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Even though I’ve made most of this book about meeting women, I don’t feel that it would be complete without at least a few ideas on how to keep a woman attracted to you for the long haul.

But first of all, here’s my take on why relationships fail:

When you first start dating someone you really like, the body releases a combination of chemicals that are quite literally intoxicating. These chemicals cause you to want to be with that person all the time, stay up all night talking to them, and have sex with them three times a day.

But twelve to eighteen months later, the chemicals change. The intoxicating chemicals are replaced by ‘stability’ chemicals. The ‘stay-up-all-night-can’t-be-away-from-her-have-sex-three-times-a-day’ feeling goes away and the ‘let’s-settle-down-and-have-two-kids-and-buy-a-minivan’ chemicals take over. Deal with it. (If you want to understand this process better, read “The Alchemy of Love and Lust” by Theresa Crenshaw.)

So now that you know this, how do you keep this whole thing from turning into an episode of “All in the Family”?

Well, the short answer is, keep up the fun, interesting, unpredictable behaviour. Notice the details. Do thoughtful things.

Here’s something that I’ve learned in life: If you want to get back more than you give, then play the stock market. It’s not gonna happen in relationships. In fact, if you want to get a lot back, you’re probably going to have to give even more.

Most people are selfish and say, “I’m not going to give more than I get.” But instead of getting a lot, all they get is old and unhappy. I’ve found that it’s much better to give a ton and get back a lot in return, not caring about the fact that I didn’t get as much as I gave than to give little or none and get back little or none.

Relationships aren’t like investing. If you want a lot, get used to giving more. But it’s worth it in the end, because love, attention, humour, and fun aren’t like money. If you give them out, you don’t have less. You have MORE. Get it?

Now that you’ve read this book, you probably have that same feeling that I had when I first learned all of this amazing material. You’re probably excited.

Well, there’s more.

If you are ready to take your education to the next level and advance at a faster pace, then you need to listen to, read, and watch my other programs. They take this foundation and expand the concepts both wide and deep... and show you tricks and shortcuts for everything from approaching women to taking things to a physical level.

Two Ways Women Think About Men And How You Can Control

This I believe that women see men with whom they get involved as either ‘long-term relationship’ material or ‘sex’ material. You have to make the choice about which category you’d like to be in. By the way, if you get involved sexually, you can usually extend that for as long as you’d like.

If, on the other hand, you don’t get involved sexually but you still buy her dinner, call her all the time, and pursue her, there’s a good chance that you’ll NEVER get involved with her sexually.

Many, if not most guys, think that if they play the dating game that they’ll wind up ‘getting some’ eventually. This just isn’t so. I’ve met so many women who say, “Well, I have this guy that I let buy me things and take me out, and I have this other one that’s my sex toy.”

Now, admittedly this isn’t all women. But believe me when I tell you that if you get on the ‘friendship’ program, you’re very likely to stay there. And the friendship road is

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paved with gifts and dinners.

Trust me. If you do too many things for her, you’re going to spend a lot of time and $$$ and most likely never wind up with anything to show for it other than a curious dry feeling just below your abdomen.

For the record, I really do like e-mail communication better than phone communication. I get probably 4 out of 5 women that I e-mail to write back, as opposed to maybe 1 out of 2 or 3 calls returned the first time.

I write and say, “Hey, it was nice meeting you last night… what are you up to this week? Would you like to join me for a cup of something wonderful and some stimulating conversation? Talk to me.”

If they don’t answer that one, I write back a couple of days later with, “What, playing hard to get already? Nice. Talk to me.”

I get most of them e-mailing me back by this point.

When they do, I say, “What’s your # and when’s a good time to reach you?”

Now, here’s why I do this… Duh! When I e-mail them, for some reason they feel like we’re friends because we’ve e-mailed back and forth… don’t ask me to explain it… it’s taken me two and a half years to figure it out.

They also return your calls after you’ve e-mailed them a couple of times… again, don’t ask me why, some freaky chick thing.

OK… so now I’m on the phone with them (either because I’ve e-mailed them, or because I just got a number and called). I want to get together with them for about 30 minutes and see what they’re like as a person and decide if they’re someone who I’d like to know better.

I’ll tell them that I was about to go do something (to remind myself and let them know that I have a life) and then say, “Well, let’s see… what’s your schedule for the next few days? (I choose a time based on her reply…) Why don’t we get together tomorrow at about four. Do you know where the blah blah blah coffee shop is? Great… if we get along, then maybe we can go for a bite to eat… but you know, coffee is a safe bet… this way, if you’re scary in person, I can say, “Oh, hey… um… I just remembered that I have to go floss my cat… it’s really important…” and then we can call it a night.”

This makes them laugh, but it also gets them thinking, “Who the hell is this guy to be qualifying me?” which is perfect.

Next, I tell them, “The coffee place is close to my house so why don’t you just meet me at my place, ring the bell, and I’ll come out and we can go… this way if you’re a few minutes early or late, I don’t have to be waiting.” (I got this idea from a friend of mine.)

Then I say, “Now, let me ask you this… what are the chances that you’re not going to show up tomorrow? <Let her answer> Because one of my pet peeves is people that are late or flaky. I can deal with a lot of things, but I’m always on time where I say I’m going to be, and I never have an excuse or don’t show up… so I just wanted to make sure… because if there’s one thing that could end our friendship before it starts, it’s flakiness.” This sets the right tone for flaking, as you can see.

***HERE COMES THE KILLER!

Next, when we’re getting ready to hang up, I say something like, “Great, it’s going to be nice to get to know you better. And if nothing else, we can just be FRIENDS.”

It’s taken me and a good friend of mine a long time to get this piece. From here on out, I constantly drop hints about just ‘being friends’ and how I really ‘like her as a friend’ and how ‘it’s nice to meet someone that I like as a friend’.

Trust me on this one… this messes them up soooooo hard that they literally don’t know what to do.

This is most likely the first time IN THEIR ENTIRE LIFE that this has happened to them. It continually triggers their insecurity and makes them wonder why

they’re not attractive enough to you. It also disarms them completely. (You have to really possess the mindset that you are qualifying them and that they’re going to be your friend for this to work)

I personally like to use the friendship jargon because I have decided that it’s better to enter any new relationship in a ‘NOT NEEDY’ frame of mind. Talking about being friends reminds ME to pay more attention and to remember that I don’t need anything and to stay focused on learning.

Places To Go

I’ve learned that it’s more interesting to GO somewhere and DO something with a woman than it is to go on a ‘date’.

If you want to do more than just have coffee with a

woman, consider going somewhere fun to shop. I prefer funky, eclectic neighborhoods and shops. These are places full of wacky and fun items. It will give you an ongoing, changing set of things to talk about.

And the best part is that you don’t have to buy anything.

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When you go to these types of places, you can just have fun and talk. Make sure you wander away from her a few times while you’re out. This keeps the ‘I’m not

needy’ thing going on.

Remember, you don’t have to spend money to have fun.

Your 7-Step Guide To Getting Physical

When you get back to the house, say, “Well, I have to get up early in the morning...but...OK, you can come in for a few minutes...” Take her on a quick tour and then sit down on a bed or on the couch. Use ‘The Kiss Test’ – Start stroking the bottom of her hair while you are talking. If she enjoys it, she’s into you! Lean in and lightly smell her shoulders… then pull back… then do it again. Slowly work your way up to smelling her neck and ears. Keep building up tension… and finally give her a kiss… then pull back. Accuse HER of being “forward”. Wait for her to make the first sexually aggressive move… then say, “All you have to do is say please”. If she says, “No no no...”, just roll over and look up away from her, which will make her curious. Pull back again and wait for her to come to you. Turn up the heat with the sensual kissing, breathing in her ears, etc. until she gets more excited (i.e. breathing getting faster, heart race starts increasing, etc.)… then make her say “please” again!

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How To Take The Next Step

OK, so we’re on the way home from coffee (because I said, “OK, let’s go…”) and we’re back at my house. Here’s one that I love… If it’s at night, look at your watch and

say, “Well, I have to get up early in the morning… but… OK, you can come in for a few minutes…”

This is perfect! You’re talking to her like she’s trying to convince you to let her in, and she hasn’t said anything! Nice. (Read it again if you didn’t pick up what I

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said.)

Then I just walk in and let her follow. (By the way, again, I always open doors for women, walk on the outside of the curb, and pull chairs out, etc.) If you act chivalrous and bust her balls at the same time, you’ll be rewarded with good things from Santa.

So now we’re in the house… and I take her for a tour… and either sit down on my bed to talk to her or on the couch… wherever we kind of wind up. And I just kind of get a little quieter and let her talk while I look at her. I lean away from her and keep looking… sometimes looking away as if I’m thinking about something.

Then, I reach over and start stroking her hair while she’s talking. I stroke down at the bottom first. If she’s OK with this, I take it as a sign that she’s WAAYYYYY into me and is probably going to be wanting sex within 60 minutes (if you have any doubts, ask a woman if she’ll let a guy stroke her hair while she’s on his bed on the first

date if she’s not into him).

This is a big piece of the puzzle that I’ve figured out… I used to do all kinds of massages and other stuff, but I now use the simple hair stroke test. If they like their hair stroked, they are at VERY LEAST going to be making out with me in short order, period. I’ll occasionally do a hand massage here or a little neck massage, but next I pull her close to me and cuddle with her… and then land the killer.

I have personally always liked the way women smell… so when she’s laying next to me with my stroking her hair, I begin to smell her shoulders… just a little at first, and then more and more… while stroking her hair. Within about 5 or 10 minutes, I’m smelling her neck and ears…no kissing, and no groping at all. Never! I’m just smelling,

then leaning back and acting like I’m completely enjoying the smelling, and it’s relaxing me. Try this, my friends… if you can keep on smelling… she’ll get so turned on that you won’t believe it! At some point she’ll try to kiss me… which is what I’m waiting for. I will let her lips get close to mine… even touch just a teensy bit… and then I’ll back away and keep smelling. I might say, “Oh, you’re kind of forward” … love it. After a few of these, I’ll kiss her… and run my hands through her hair… the whole romantic kiss thing… then, again, I’ll stop. This kind of teasing and teasing is very stimulating to women. They love it.

I’m waiting for her to start doing something that is sexual... for instance grinding her hips on me... or grabbing my ass... whatever.

When I’m patient, the woman will usually do something that is subtly sexual FIRST. This is key, as she’s then the aggressor....

Then I do a little verbal move and say, “All you have to do is say PLEASE.”

I’m laughing as I write this... damn this is great.

So the first time, she’ll say, “No no no... I’m not going to beg you...” and I just say, “OK”...

Then I roll over or just lay back and look up... away from her. This usually makes the woman begin to wonder what the heck is going on and come over and start cuddling, kissing, etc. me again.

I keep on with the sensual kissing, breathing in her ears... all that good stuff... and when she gets worked up again and I hear her breathing getting faster, heart rate increasing, etc., I just say, “All you have to do is say PLEASE...”

OK, you get the idea... I keep doing this until she says, “OK OK, please... please...”

If you need help on what to do after this step, buy a copy of” How To Drive Your Woman Wild In Bed” by Graham Masterson and “Sexational Secrets” by Susan Bakos. Do it.

The First Date Is NOT An Interview

I have had so many readers write and ask me, “How should I act on the first date? What should we talk about? How do you keep the conversation interesting?”, that I

felt I should address these points a bit further.

The first thing to remember when you’re meeting up with a girl for ‘a date’ is that it’s NOT an INTERVIEW. You’re not applying for a job (and neither is she), so don’t act like it.

It’s so funny to me when I sit down in a restaurant and I hear a couple that’s obviously out on their first date... and the guy has no idea what to do. It sounds

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something like this:

“So, did you grow up around here?”

“Where did you go to school?”

“Do you have brothers and sisters?”

“What kinds of things do you like to do for fun?”

Painful. Why is it that people tend to act like they’re on job interviews when they go out on dates? It’s such a not-right thing to do. I mean, no wonder women sit around with each other and complain about how hard it is to find an interesting guy in this world.

Here’s a good rule of thumb: ONLY ASK QUESTIONS OR TALK ABOUT COMMON, BORING, PREDICTABLE TOPICS LIKE SCHOOL, WORK AND FAMILY IF YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY RUN OUT OF ALL OTHER OPTIONS.

And why is this? Good question. And I’m glad you asked.

First, let’s talk about WHY most guys allow the conversation to turn to these ultra-boring topics... Most guys approach a first date from the perspective of ‘I don’t want to screw this up’. In other words, they try to play it safe and not do anything or say anything that the girl might not like.

They try to present themselves as ‘nice guys’ who love mom, have a good job, and are stable.

Somehow, guys have gotten the idea that if they act nice, buy dinner, and talk about the same old things that everyone else uses to bore women to tears that they might get lucky and score (or at least get a kiss and a second opportunity to buy dinner). I don’t know where this concept came from, but it’s just not a very effective approach.

WOMEN AREN’T ATTRACTED TO THE SAME OLD SAME OLD, BORING, PREDICTABLE CONVERSATION. Attraction happens when there is energy, spice, humour, mystery... COCKY AND FUNNY... and saucy conversation.

So if you want to create ATTRACTION instead of BOREDOM, you’re going to have to learn a new way. You’re going to have to learn to talk about something else.

The trick to not talking about the ‘usual’ things is to know how to make conversation INTERESTING.

Let me ask you, what are the most INTERESTING topics to humans in general? Right – drama, violence, scandal, and comedy that is painful to one of the parties involved. Here are a few good ideas for conversation that come to mind:

“So what’s with The Osbournes being MTV’s #1 show of all time? I guess people just can’t get enough of dysfunctional family life... they have to watch it on TV too.”

“I’m so bummed that Justin broke up with Britney. They were so damn cute together. I was hoping that they’d have a daughter with fake blonde hair and breast implants at birth.”

“Have you tuned into this ‘Cheaters’ TV show? Don’t you just love it when they come storming into someone’s house and catch the wife in bed with another guy on national TV?”

These topics will light up a conversation like nobody’s business. And they create all kinds of opportunities to be cocky and funny while talking about the misfortunes and

neurotic behaviour of others. The trick is that you must remember you’re not there to impress her, and you’re not on a job interview. The more you act nervous, stilted, and

uncomfortable... like you’re trying to impress her and get her approval... and like you don’t want to say anything that might make her disapprove of you, the less likely you are to trigger that all-important ATTRACTION inside of her.

And here’s a real twist on this theme: If SHE starts asking the ‘normal’ questions about school, job, family, etc. this is a perfect opportunity to bust on her and say, “What, is this a job interview?” or “Can’t you think of something interesting to talk about? Please, spare me the pain of the usual school-job-family conversation. Let’s save that until we’re picking names for our kids.”

Here are a few other good ideas for conversation:

1)  History. Women love to hear stories about the history of places. If you’re in an interesting part of town, tell her the story of how the area came to be named, or why the city was built where it is. And if the story involves a tale of love and/or scandal, all the better.

2)  Anything superficial, classy, and basically meaningless. Try learning a little about fashion, so this way you can make fun of it while acting like you know what you’re talking about. “Didn’t Madonna really screw up the fashion world with this whole over-the-top fake cowboy look thing?”

3)  Comedy Psychological Analysis. Have fun by giving your wild perspective on others. “You know, I’ve been trying to figure out why so many people these days are going postal and shooting everyone. I think it might be all the NSYNC, Britney Spears, and Backstreet Boys on the radio.” This one can be a lot of fun... be creative.

Do you see where I’m going with this? If you want to keep her interest, then you have to be INTERESTING. The old-fashioned act-like-you’re-on-a-job interview rap just doesn’t cut it. Now, for some guys, the ideas that I’ve just talked about will make sense but won’t come naturally. That’s OK. You may have to work on this for awhile, especially if you’ve spent the last 25 or so years doing the wrong thing. Old Proverb: “No matter how far down the wrong road you’ve gone, TURN BACK.”

So remember, attraction isn’t a choice. And attraction doesn’t make logical sense. If you want to create that magical “chemistry”, then you’re going to have to LEARN and PRACTICE it.

10 Steps To A Guaranteed Great Date

Remember that YOU are qualifying HER to see if she is someone you want to spend more time with… and not the other way around. Too many dinners and gifts early on will lead you into ‘the friendship zone’. Impress her with YOURSELF instead. E-mail her first to build to build familiarity. Call her on the phone to set up the date after she e-mails you back. On the phone, joke that SHE might turn out to be weird. This subtlety lets her know that YOU are normal and fun. Have her meet you at your place so you don’t end up waiting around… and so she will be coming back to your place afterwards.  Use ‘The Flake Test’ – Ask her what the chances are that she won’t show to set the tone up front. Be the first to say “friends” – let her know that you are looking forward to making a friend if nothing else… this lets her know you have no expectations and aren’t needy or desperate. Mention this during the date! Show her that you aren’t overly interested by heading to the coffee shop quickly instead of lingering around at your place. At the coffee shop, RELAX and treat her like your best friend. Lean back, talk about INTERESTING topics like drama, violence, scandal, or comedy, and make cocky/funny jokes.  You can save the compliments for another time. If you want to spend more time with her, go someplace where the conversation is built-in, like a place with fun shops and things to do. Wander away from her a few times to communicate that you aren’t ‘needy’ or clingy.adult friend finder registration

When You Meet

When they arrive at your place, say ‘hi’ and invite them in for a minute while you get your coat or shoes. Then walk out and seem like YOU’RE IN A HURRY TO

LEAVE. Most guys would try to get them to stay and get

cozy with them. You want them to think that you’re not

overly interested and that you want some coffee.

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Total indifference.

At coffee, just sit and be the funny and cocky self, make jokes, and in general lean back and make ‘friends’.

I used to analyze handwriting, do palmistry, do hand massages, and touch women when I first meet them. Not anymore (I save these things for later).

Also, I used to be more ‘touchy feely’ with women at the very beginning. As I mentioned, I’d massage their hands and touch them a lot, etc. leading to kissing, etc.

early on.

I’ve now learned that if I lean back and almost don’t touch them at all on purpose, it creates this tension so that when I do actually touch them, they respond powerfully. In communication they call this ‘Building Response Potential’.

Sometimes I’ll massage hands or touch, but I don’t overdo it.

I’m just sitting there ACTING LIKE WE’RE BEST FRIENDS. When you act like they’re a best friend, they will rapidly get comfortable with you. I make fun of people, whatever. I just totally lean back and relax. I’m cool, relaxed, and constantly making comments about how we’re going to be friends, etc.

I’ve learned never to compliment a hot woman on her looks, period. I still mess up and forget, and I’m always reminded why I don’t do it. I try to find one thing that she’s insecure about and talk to her about it like ‘a friend’… not overly critical, but not saying, ‘No, you shouldn’t be insecure’… I just keep bringing it up and even make jokes about it.