Can You Turn Him Straight?

By the time an adult woman is in her late twenties, she has probably had the unfortunate luck of falling for a gay man at one point in her young life. It can be a devastating blow to the ego when somebody you’re in love with has told you they rather date men. You keep wondering how they were so good at sex and pleasing you constantly. You can even begin convincing yourself that this is just a phase they’re going through like a drunken college girl during her freshman year.

Unfortunately if you think you can turn your recent ex-boyfriend straight then you will be entering a world of pain and denial. Even if the object of your affections seems confused and harbors some feelings for you, it doesn’t mean they’re going to change their path to be with you and even if they do, it doesn’t mean it will be a genuine relationship either.

Letting go of an ex who reveals that he’s gay is far harder to do than any other ex. This is because deep down inside, you know there will never be a chance of reuniting. What’s even harder to deal with is the fact that deep down you already saw the signs ages ago and may have just been waiting for the other shoe to drop.

So if your boyfriend has come out of the closet, let him be free even if he’s scared to be out. If he is confused as to who he wants to be with, point him in the direction he needs to go to. Stop primping yourself up. Stop trying to make him jealous and if you can’t be around him without holding back tears, then let him know. It will be difficult, but it’s better to eventually have this person in your life as a great friend than having him shun for you for years to come because of your constant efforts to change him.

Be smart and be strong and give yourself time to heal. It’s only then you will be able to put this ordeal behind you and be able to find the right one for you in the long run.

Have A Mind Blowing Yogasm?

Have you been stressed out in your adult dating life? Has the sex been dwindling in your relationship? Why not kill two birds with one stone by having a yogasm today! Yoga is great at keeping a person’s stress levels low and it’s even better for increasing your chances of having a mind blowing orgasm.

Rumors of the mysterious yogasm have been going around for years, but up until this year, many people were afraid to take about the unexplained sensation. Teachers, students and sex researchers have been honing in on the yoga orgasm phenomenon. Women have been openly discussing how a woman can bring herself to climax without even touching herself.

Yoga’s goal is to strengthen the muscles in and around the genitalia, which is the equal to weight lifting for the genitals. (Yeesh!) When ladies work out their PC or Kegel muscles, the tissue around the g-spot get swollen and leads to orgasm….hence the term YOGASM.

Now if women can get over the visual image of a dumbbell being hung from their labia lips, then maybe more of them would be on board for having a yogasm. They shouldn’t be discouraged from exploring their sexuality without having to buy expensive dildos and batteries all the time to get off. Now a woman can get off and work out at the same time. What’s not to love?

So what are you waiting for? Have you first yogasm now!

The Dating World's Life Lessons

When you start dating as a teenager, the problems you encounter are so small in the scheme of things. As we get older, our adult dating lives become a little more trickier to maneuver. There comes a point in everybody’s adult life where a decent amount of self-discovery and reflection must be taken to effectively evolve with present or future partners. The heart ages last and when you date, you discover it is a huge learning process. Here are some insights everybody should discover in their lives about the dating world:

1. Our Needs Evolve As Well As Our Wants

Remember that lover who broke your heart when you were a teenager? Remember thinking how you couldn’t go on? Now when you think about it, you want to die of embarrassment. The reason for that is we are always evolving. Our dreams, desires and love interests change as often as our career goals. No matter what, time really does help heal all wounds and it helps us move on.

We Find Long-Term Soulmates and Short-Term Kindred Spirits

By the time you reach your early to mid twenties, you will meet someone that will change your life. They deeply impact us with their world views and perceptions of life that are quite similar to yours. Maybe they are your mentors or maybe they were someone you met on your way to work. You always meet someone who shapes you into the person you are today. Even short-term kindred spirits change you for the better. Just because someone came into your life for only a season, doesn’t mean they weren’t there for a reason.

Settling Vs. Commitment

When you get old enough to question relationship issues, you learn that even the most committed partners sometimes hurt behind closed doors. We either gain the life partner skills we need and learn not to settle or we succumb to living miserably in unhappy relationships. It is an important life choice only the brave don’t take for granted.

Your Ideal Partner Always Changes

Remember when you would only date blond, blue-eyed singles? The older you get, you realize appearances are not as important as strong connections. You learn how to evaluate what kind of person can make you happy for the moment and possibly for life. Compatibility is more important than physical attraction.

How Not to Let the Drama of a Relationship Affect Your Friendship

It’s fight night! Get out the wine and the pints of low fat ice cream as you prepare for another epic long night of consoling your friend after a fight with her unworthy boyfriend.

At first, the drama in our adult dating relationships actually do help bond female friendships. We have fun talking about our arguments with our boyfriends and our turbulent sex lives.

However, some relationships are full of too much drama and there may be many times you have to hear about or even see in person, your friend harboring fury for their lover and have to experience all the make up and break up stories. When this happens, you find yourself biting your tongue considering all the times she had bit her tongue in regards to your own love life. Although, when it becomes more and more apparent that your friend is with the wrong fella, it gets harder every time to refrain from screaming ‘DUMP HIM NOW!’ from the top of your lungs.

It can be truly exhausting to see your friend in so much misery and pain and it can be even more exhausting when they hardly take your advice into consideration. You can’t help it at first to listen to their tearful plight. However, when the tears have dried up, the hate for their lovers has disappeared and the relationship is miraculously back on track without any serious improvements made, it can make any good friend want to scream and shake their friends especially when you know that they will be arguing sooner than you can update your Facebook wall status.

When you’re really good friends with someone, it’s important to be able to share your honest opinions but only when asked for. Nobody wants to hear anything negative and most women expect their best friends to be their biggest cheerleaders. Sometimes it’s necessary to say the truth especially when they used tough love on you in the past.

Let your friend know that you love them and make them understand how relationships are meant to be enjoyed and they are not things you endure through. Don’t compare your relationship to theirs because no relationship is the same no matter what Sex And The City makes us believe.

Let them know how you pray for their happiness more often than you pray for your own. Let them know that unhealthy relationships should not be dragged on for years and how it’s essential to know that one of the many purposes of our life is to progress and settle. If you can’t do that, watch an episode of Jersey Shore and watch them squirm and cringe when watching Ron and Sammi many fighting sagas.

Will your friend get upset when hearing this? Hell yes, she will! But if she is a good friend, she will realize you have her best interests at heart and she will probably be more annoyed at the fact that what you are saying makes sense in the long run.

After you get out your thoughts, leave the subject alone for good. You are NOT your friend’s relationship guru. You are her friend and if you are her best friend, you will stand by every one of her decisions and choices in her love life, regardless of the fact that you may not agree with them.

We are all responsible for our own decisions and more importantly, our own happiness. Never let drama between relationships affect your long-lasting friendships. It’s just not worth it.

Who Is The Ultimate Jerry Dandridge?

At three years old, I had my first adult male crush and his name was Jerry Dandridge. Yup, I fell in “love” with a vampire.He didn’t sparkle in the sunlight because he was a bad ass creature of the night. All I had to do to see him was put in Fright Night in my father’s Betamax player and I was hooked for hours gazing at Chris Sarandon.

In spite of the fact that I clearly didn’t have much censorship from my parents, watching Fright Night was the catalyst for how I picked out my men–dark, tall, handsome with a hint of homosexual tendencies.

That’s why when I heard of the news about the Fright Night remake, I was livid by the fact of having my dream man re-cast—that was however before hearing about the unbelievable casting of Colin Farrell as Jerry Dandridge.

So the question is, who on paper makes for the ultimate Jerry Dandridge? Let’s weigh the pros and cons, shall we?

Smarts

Winner: Colin Farrell

I hate to say this, but I have to give this one to Colin Farrell. The vamp ingeniously blows up Charlie’s house because he was not invited into his home. (Seriously, why has it taken this long for a vampire to do that onscreen?) Chris Sarandon constantly ate naked prostitutes in front of his window and instead of moving when sunlight hit him, he just stood in one spot having a temper tantrum. Not very smart if you ask me.

Sex Appeal

Winner: Chris Sarandon

I have to give this one to Chris Sarandon. His dashing good looks, appealing walk (yes, walking can be appealing) and irresistible charm are timeless. Still to this day, I would want to tap that. (Chris Sarandon circa 1985 not now) Sure, Colin Farrell looks extremely sexy in the upcoming remake but anybody who addresses somebody as “Hey guy” or calls attractive women “ripe” is lame in my books.

Morals

Death to all peeping Toms!

Winner: Chris Sarandon

Sure Chris Sarandon went nuts by turning both Charlie’s girlfriend and best friend into vampires, but the man did give Charlie a chance for his safety when he demanded to be left alone. In the trailer for the remake, it doesn’t look like Colin Farrell has much mercy for Charlie after being “found out.” That’s not necessarily a bad thing after all. Bad boys are and will always be extremely hot.

Who Has Got The Bigger…Fangs?

I need Braces Stat!

Winner: Tie

Chris Sarandon showed off some mighty long fangs in the beginning of the cult classic. However, when he went “full out” vampire, it looked like he needed braces. We have yet to see if Colin Farrell goes “full” vampire in the remake. Curious to see how bad he looks. It can’t be any worse than how he looked in Horrible Bosses.

GayDar Alert

Winner(or Loser): Chris Sarandon

Chris Sarandon definitely takes the cake for the vamp with the most homosexual tendencies. I suspect his “housekeeper” Billy was doing more than just house keeping. Also, the fact that he constantly had a fruit in his hands is an amusing if not highly inappropriate giveaway.

My Personal Choice For The Ultimate Jerry Dandridge: Chris Sarandon

Like Sidney Prescott once so eloquently said in Scream 4: “Don’t f*ck with the original.”

7 Dating Mistakes Women Make Daily

In order to attract the opposite sex, women go to certain lengths to impress a guy they want to start dating. However, there are certain fashion, beauty and conversation faux pas women consistently make and they do not go unnoticed by men either. If you’re wondering why your adult dating life is going the way you want, then maybe you should check the following list to see if you are committing any of these cardinal sins:

1. The Baby Voice

Why oh why do women find it sexy to put on a baby voice? Unless you have a reality show to secure, there is no need for any women to put on this voice for any man. When men hear this, we think you have severe daddy issues. Plain and simple.

2. Hair Extensions

There is nothing more unattractive than trying to kiss a girl for the first time and pulling out a track of hair extensions when trying to stroke her hair. Hair extensions are fine once in a while, but never wear them if you’re trying to attract a new guy. Your plan will fail miserably if you do.

3. Spray Tans

I want to know why women think men care about henna dyed skin on women. I think other women are the ones that comment on how hot they look. No man wants to date an oompa loompa. It literally frightens men when you change into a human mood ring that reeks for 24 hours.

4. Acting Like A Hilton

Contrary to popular belief, men actually like to DATE smart women. So stop twirling your hair and asking the waiter how they were able to get strands of hair from heaven when you order the angelhair pasta dish. Men want to bang dumb girls like that. They don’t want to date them.

5. Your Not So Skinny Jeans

Let’s face it: Skinny jeans are not for everyone. You can be a perfectly healthy girl with a great body, but sometimes those jeans make your butt crack show too much. Men don’t want to date women that look like they belong in a trailer park.

6. Draw in Eye Brows

Eyebrows are a very important feature on a woman’s face. It’s perfectly normal to over pluck one day, but when you’re filling out your eyebrows with what looks like Black Sharpie ink, it will totally repulse the man you are seeking to date.

7. Tarantula Lashes

God damn Drew Barrymore and those stupid Covergirl ads. She has deluded women everywhere that they can have perfect eye lashes without applying very expensive fake eye lashes on first. Please know that you only need a couple coats of mascara, ladies. Anything more and you’ll look like a spider is growing legs out of your eyelids.

Bring Us A Condom Variety Pack Already!

Dear Condom Manufacturers,

Thank you for your continued service of bringing pleasure to women by providing ribs, twists and sensations to your condom brands. It is much appreciated. However, I have a dilemma that is common with many single women who enjoy having sex with multiple partners. I need to do inventory on my condom supply. You may think this has a simple solution. You’re probably thinking, “Well bitch, just take your lazy ass to the pharmacy and buy some already.” I really wish it was as simple as that.

It’s not that I’m humiliated to buy them. I’ve been buying condoms without blushing since I was sixteen years old. (Daddy issues!) My problem is the lack of variety you put in your packs. If you’re an adult who is sexually active and you have multiple partners, it’s hard to decipher how “well endowed” some men are going to be. While single ladies like myself love buying the gold Trojan Magnum packs, those behemoth lovers are very far and few between. What happens when we pick up a Croatian guy at club that is hung like a thimble or what if we pick up an Irish “Average Joe?”

Let’s face the truth now. If I have a magnum sized pack of condoms and hand one over to a random guy I’m hooking up with, do you think he is going to like the fact that I sleep with men with gargantuan penises? I don’t think so. Do you think my ‘Tiny Tim’ will want to inflate his male ego by trying to do the deed with an oversized sheath over his male member? He probably would, but he would never stay erect.

I don’t want to purchase multiple boxes of condoms and look like a well-paid and worked prostitute at the pharmacy desk. I just want to buy my condoms like I buy my tampons: in a variety pack. Since all you condom manufacturers make your money from being inventive with flavored, tipped, ripped and long lasting condoms, why not put all of them in one pack? I don’t think it’s too much to ask for. It’s a simple request that would help many womens’ dating lives. Trust me.
P.S. Your spermicidal lubricant smells like crap. It’s not rocket science, people! Lube those condoms up with something else, please!

How To Sh*t Where You Eat With A Little Grace

If you’re looking to improve how you handle your adult dating situation, take the following steps if you’re thinking about shitting where you eat.

1. Meet Hot Neighbour.

2. Run into hot neighbour at the elevator.

3. Have a deep conversation about your favorite HBO show with said neighbour.

4. Add neighbour on Facebook.

5. Poke him or her on Facebook.

6. Exchange phone numbers.

7. Set up a friendly lunch date.

8. Run into neighbour again while looking hot as all hell.

9. Go out to bar with hot neighbour after work.

10. Drink and talk about sexual things with neighbour.

11. Make out on the sidewalk with neighbour.

12. Send dirty text to neighbour when you get home.

13. Consider changing your Facebook Status.

14. See sexy wall post from a hot single on neighbour’s wall.

15. Decide dating your neighbour is a horrible idea after they tell you they don’t want anything serious right now.

16. Become friends with neighbour.

17. Suggest you go out to a friendly lunch with neighbour.

18. Suggest they come back to your place for a night cap with neighbour.

19. Drink a whole bottle of wine with neighbour.

20. Have amazing sex with neighbour.

21. Try to keep yourself busy when your neighbour hasn’t called in three days.

22. Run into neighbour on the elevator with his new conquest on Sunday morning.

23. Cry on your friend’s couch for hours and talk about your neighbour.

24. Avoid Neighbour.

25. Drunk dial neighbour.

26. Hang up before neighbour anwers.

26. Avoid neighbour some more.

27. Post Crazy Cat Eharmony video clip on his Facebook wall nonchalantly to show how funny you are.

28. Run into neighbour. Limit conversation to cats and Youtube.

29. Watch neighbour run away.

30. Move.

What’s the lesson to this tale of woe? You can never shit where you eat and still maintain your dignity. Just don’t it.

Your Court

One of our most popular expressions say that the ball is in our court, which means it is our turn to make a decision and volley back. We also hear talk about dropping the ball, which is obviously a football metaphor about us not doing something that we were supposed to do. We are supposed to keep all of our balls in the air, or live up to all of our responsibilities. There are dress balls, military balls and when we have a good time, we usually say that we had a ball. Well, thanks to the world wide web and all of the adult dating websites, we can now pay attention to the other balls. You know those happy symmetrical anatomical ones that are often not discussed in polity company.

Whether the ball that we are concerned about is lurking around in our court, has been dropped on the field, is being juggled in the air, is hosting rich people or men in uniform, or providing us with a good time, we can use the Internet to enhance our experience. The world wide web contains a tremendous amount of resources on every subject in the entire world, and thanks to all of the advances in modern technology, we never ever have to feel uninformed.

Let’s not ignore those other balls that are so important, but that are often only spoken of in hushed tones. We need those too. Sometimes we need them touching our chin as we give their owner a heartfelt blow job. Other times we need to hold them in our hands as we kiss their owner passionately. Still other times we need to feel them slam up against us as we get very handily fucked from behind. No, they don’t get a lot of press, but they are probably the most necessary types of balls in our lives. And the Internet can help us to locate them and make friends with them.

How to Get Her Interested in Anal Sex

So, you’ve been in a relationship for a while now. You’ve had sex with her in every possible position you and her Cosmopolitan magazine can think of, yet every time you mention having anal sex, she always runs screaming for the hills. You’ve tried everything from trying to get her to watch anal porn to getting her drunk but every one of your attempts have failed. So, how do you get her interested in taking it up the pooper? It’s not as difficult as you may think it is and be following my trusty guidelines, you will be having Xxx anal fun in no time!

1. Talk Dirty to her During Sex

Sounds a little too easy to actually work but women truly get off on your dirty words. After you’ve been with someone for a while, you usually got your typical “fuck” phrases down pat. Stir up your dirty dictionary by throwing out some kinkier phrases when you’re giving it to her. When she’s fully aroused, ask her if you can fuck her in the ass. Don’t demand it. Ask for it. You don’t want her to feel like a prisoner in Oz.

2. Arouse Her When it’s That Time of Month

I’m not suggesting you create crime scene sex in your bedroom, but when you seduce her on her period, she is far more open to suggestion. She will probably avoid wanting to have sex the good old fashioned way, but if you bring up anal sex nonchalantly, she may surprise you by agreeing to partake in the act with you.

3. Take Poppers!

In case some of you that don’t know what Poppers are, they are brown solvents you sniff in bottles you can find at any major health or drug store that a lot of homosexual couples use when performing anal sex. Sniffing poppers is not unhealthy and it boosts blood pressure while also relaxing the anus for easy entry.

Does Anybody Really Have Make-up Sex?

If you have watched any R-rated movie with Angelina Jolie, you would be tricked into believing that every couple that has an argument or beats each other up is destined to have wild and passionate sex afterwards. However, how often does that truly happen in your own adult dating life?

90% of the time, fights and arguments rarely are rewarded with mind-blowing orgasms afterwards. In fact, most times couples don’t even want to look at each other, let alone have their genitals touch. If you’re living with your partner and you have a fight, most times somebody is spending the night on the couch or at a friend’s house to get away from their partner that is driving them crazy…and not in the good way.

Forget dirty talk, nail scratching and blowfish-sized hickeys when you’re having a fight with a lover that is as stubborn as you are. The silent treatment can last for days until one person breaks their vow of silence just so the fighting will come to an end. Thankfully once you’re speaking to one another again, hugs kisses and love-making resumes. However, is sex after a cooling off period really the same as “make up sex?”

Based upon what we learned from films, soap operas and trashy magazines, “make up sex” is supposed to be far more intense than a normal romp in the sack with your significant other. Anger is a key attribute to the passion and fear of losing your partner is also said to be responsible for the level of intensity “make up sex” brings. Although, what draws the line from “back to normal sex” and “make up sex?”

The key factor in make up love-making is the timeframe. Unless the fight was fresh, it’s not considered to be “make up sex.” However, is this a healthy thing to happen in your relationship? Yes and no.

If rarely done, make up sex can be full of passion and sparks and can help sustain intimacy during rough patches and dry spells in your relationship. It’s only human to feel a little turned on after an argument and in the heat of an argument, your levels of dopamine and adrenaline rise, making you feel aroused and excited.

Unfortunately, there are couples out there that only get a rush from this kind of sex and will sabotage their relationship by creating fights just so they can get off.

Make-up sex does occur in relationships from time to time, and once in a blue moon it can really help bring the spark back. Just don’t think you’ll look like Angelina Jolie when you’re doing it.

How to Use Online Personals to Get Women Into Bed

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Best Conversation Topics With Women

There are really two very different (and important) aspects to the 'conversations with women' topic:

1. The HOW.

2. The WHAT.

THE HOW

Most guys want to know 'what to talk about' with women.

It only makes sense that you should talk about things that women are interested in... right?

Well... partially.

It is actually FAR MORE IMPORTANT to talk about whatever topic you're talking about in the RIGHT WAY.

In other words, if you don't understand HOW to carry on a conversation that creates ATTRACTION, then it really won't matter WHAT you talk about... because the woman you're talking to won't FEEL anything towards you.

The HOW of conversation includes (but is not limited to):

-Your body language
-Eye contact
-The Cocky & Funny style of communicating
-Flirting
-Sending mixed messages
-Directing the conversation
-Dealing with common questions and topics

...and many other things.

My point is that if you're running into a lot of 'uncomfortable silences', nervousness, and other usual challenges, then you probably need to get the HOW handled before the WHAT.

THE WHAT

With that said, there are several topics that are GREAT to discuss with women.

But instead of just giving them to you, I want you to do yourself a favor and THINK for a minute.

What topics do women PAY to hear about?

Hint: Cosmo magazine, romance novels, soap operas, nighttime dramas, the fashion channel... etc.

If you think about it, the answer to this question is rather obvious.

For whatever reason, WOMEN tend to LOVE:

-Drama
-Conflict
-Romance
-Famous people and their lives

So... it's really quite easy to enjoy a conversation with a woman about these topics.

Here are a few ideas:

1. Play amateur psychologist to the stars.

Talk about how someone famous is doing something really stupid, then psycho-analyze them.

For instance... right now, Michael Jackson is something like two hundred million dollars in debt. Even though he makes about twenty million dollars a year, he somehow manages to blow it all and then some. He has spent an unimaginable amount of time and money on plastic surgery and skin bleaching... and he reportedly just spent around seven hundred grand digitally darkening his skin tone in a recent video.

This situation is all kinds of BEGGING to be picked apart with a fine-toothed critical mind.

It's also PREGNANT with humor opportunities.

2. Find an interesting-looking group of people and guess what's going on.

Look around you, and find a couple sitting at a table that looks like they're on their first date.

Then start making fun of how the guy is acting, how he's dressed, his posture, or whatever. Talk about how the woman is thinking that he's a dork and how he's not getting any, no matter how many compliments he gives her.

Analyzing what's going on with a close group of others is big fun, and women love it.

3. Make fun of someone famous.

Talk about how a super model is too skinny, or how Ozzy has killed all his brain cells and what a shame it is that he's on TV broadcasting it to millions of viewers.

Make fun of Mariah Carey for gaining weight, being put in the loony bin, and putting out a sucky movie.

All you have to do is read a few gossip magazines to get all kinds of great stuff to make fun of.

It's fun, it's funny, and it's a great way to talk like you're all that.

4. Talk about other people's love lives.

Talk about the problems that others are going through when it comes to love and romance, then volunteer completely ridiculous theories about what's going on.

Mention a friend you had who broke up with his girlfriend because she gained weight, then after you've told the story, make up a random theory about how women who gain weight are actually lesbians.

But make sure it's funny, whatever you invent.

...I think you can 'feel me'.

The point here is that women are NATURALLY fascinated and drawn to certain topics... so USE THEM.

The REAL benefit of talking to women about topics that really interest them is that you can USE ALL THE OTHER IDEAS THAT YOU'RE LEARNING while you're talking!

You can AMPLIFY THE ATTRACTION as the conversation goes on... as long as you know what else to do as you talk.

Oh, by the way...

Topics to avoid: Rape, kidnapping, stalking, death, chess, computers, comic books, Star Wars, monster trucks, and NSYNC. NEVER talk about topics that might really freak a woman out, or topics that make you look like the biggest loser alive in the beginning. You'll create BAD VIBES that will make any attraction that you've created INSTANTLY disappear. Others to really avoid include talking negatively about yourself, talking about how desperate you are or how long it's been since you've been on a date, asking if she likes you or if you're her 'type'... and any other WUSS-BAG topic that makes you look insecure and needy.

Remember, the key to success with women is creating a powerful emotional ATTRACTION between you and her.

Why You Should Touch Her

The common view of kino (note: kino = touching) is that you're giving the woman pleasure and that this arouses her and makes her attached to you.

That is certainly true, and we're lucky we live in a time when doing kino with a woman is considered acceptable as soon as you start getting to know her. In older times, guys like Casanova had to be extraordinarily seductive with their *words* just so they could get to the point where they could begin to use kino.

But the key thing to understand about kino is that when you initiate it with a chick whom you're just getting to know, is that it isn't merely an arousing stimulus, it also challenges the barriers between you.

The presence of those invisible barriers which you both maintain in your minds is really the key difference between being lovers and strangers.

Typical "nice guy" behavior is to respect those barriers too much and to never challenge them. That by definition maintains the barriers, leaving them in place.

Doesn't matter how well he gets to know the chick, if he leaves those barriers in place he will never be her lover -- THAT is why he ends up in the friend category. Because he actually reinforced the barriers instead of destroying them.

Anyway, the next level up from AFC is to realize that you have to crumble those barriers, so you work on them, but you're still leery about causing any anxiety, and still a bit nervous about challenging the barriers. So you look for excuses to touch, or you reach out and caress her but it has a slightly rushed quality because you're trying to mask some underlying nervousness.

Ultimately, where you want to get to is the point where you recognize that for a woman, the experience of having you challenging the barriers is not ONLY a source of anxiety for her, but is also a source of EXCITEMENT.

And the idea is to shift the balance so that she experiences more excitement than anxiety.

Ever see a baby fall down? Notice how they don't know whether to laugh it off or cry so they look to their parents to see the parents face? If the parent frowns with concern then the baby starts crying. If the parent smiles, the baby starts laughing.

Same with women. When you are entering new territory with a woman by challenging the "touch barriers" between you and her, then you have to do it calmly and confidently and that CAUSES her to experience it as exciting. If you do it nervously she'll experience it as something that isn't right and that makes her uncomfortable.

One of the best ways to show confidence is to do it slowly, instead of rushing it. Nervous people rush things to mask their nervousness.

Nervous people also look away, so you calmly make eye contact. And nervous people look serious, so be sure to smile a lot.

Nervous people also make their voice tense, so you make yours relaxed, and make your posture very open and relaxed rather than being closed and tense.

All these things will convey confidence causing her mind to interpret your touch as a source of excitement, rather than a source of anxiety.

The more you understand (and vicariously feel) the way your touch EXCITES her, the more you will naturally become confident about doing it.

Besides conveying confidence, the other thing you need to do with kino is to strike a balance so it is neither too challenging, nor too tame.

As you start slowly caressing her -- her hand or her arm or her waist or back, or maybe feeling her cheek or her hair with your hand -- the ideal to strive for is that you want to keep her gently balanced on the very edge of being too excited, so it is never too much for her to handle, nor so mild that it becomes tame.

Main Fears of Women That You Need to Handle First

The most important sexual organ you possess as a man is your mind. You must use your mental powers to arouse a woman and to handle her objections and fears to get her into bed. In many ways, you’re going to have to talk your way into bed. Before discussing her fears, however, I want to warn you about your own. You cannot have a negative internal dialogue with yourself and all sorts of doubts and negative thoughts racing through your brain when you’re seducing a woman or you will surely sabotage yourself. So don’t allow yourself to dwell upon your fear of rejection, your inadequacies, or any doubts you have about yourself. You must stay positive and expect the best to occur every time you are with a woman. Believe in yourself, relax, and have fun. Women will be less likely to resist any move you make if you are natural and carefree. Like a beautiful young woman once told me, “The fewer a guy’s worries are, usually the more attractive he is.”

Much of the criteria upon which a woman bases her decision on whether or not she is going to give it up revolves around her basic fears. A woman must first be free of any anxiety or fears before she will invite you to ravage her. You need to clear away the obstacles to the bedroom. Understand a woman’s fears and you can leverage a woman’s point of view to your advantage.

A woman has three main fears that you need to handle to clear the path to pleasure, ease, and her enjoyment of sex. First, she fears that she is not as beautiful as she needs to be, or could be, or should be. Women are always worried about their weight, the size of their breasts, their wardrobe, and their overall attractiveness. To eliminate these fears of inadequacy, tell her how beautiful she is. Tell her what you think of her skin, her neck, her legs, and especially her eyes. But don’t mention her breasts unless they’re perfect and not until you have already caressed them. Complement her about her clothes, her eye makeup, her jewelry, and never, NEVER critize her or belittle her in any way when you’re making your move toward the bedroom.

Her second biggest fear is her fear of abandonment. She needs to feel that after you make love to her that you are still going to be with her in the future. Reassure her that you are now a part of her life. In your pre-bedroom conversation, tell her how much you look forward to spending time with her in the future, and explain why you can see the two of you together for a long time, and talk about exciting things you will do together over the weeks and months ahead.

The third big fear to handle before getting a woman into bed is her fear of unwanted pregnancy or contracting the AIDS virus. You deal with this fear by broaching the subject of condoms before you get all hot with passion. Most women now days will not have sex with you unless you’re wearing a condom. As a Chinese girlfriend of mine was fond of saying, “No cover wang, no get bang!” Your job is to reassure her ahead of time that you use condoms and that you have a supply of them on hand. Look for ways to talk about the subject of condoms in a non-threatening way. Say something sometime early on like, “I think it’s really important that people use condoms when making love.” Try to word it in a way that uses third party names and references; don’t say ‘you’ like to use condoms don’t you.

How to Attract Women

Do not worry about your problems with women at all. Focus on maintaining a happy persona.

A girl that I work with is always ill-mannered, it makes her VERY unattractive. I always thought of her as an uglo, until one day where she was VERY happy and I noticed that she was kind of cute.

When I was in my best moods, I attracted the most women.

When I was looking for validation, I got rejected the hardest.

When I was the most arrogant, people started to put me down the most.

When I tried to act like the smartest, I said the dumbest things.

The times when the most good things happened to me, were the times when I was in a good mood to begin with.

The times when the worst things happened to me, were the times when I was in a poor mood.

What does this mean?

You must make your own happiness. From that, all will fall into place. If you depend on the world to do it for you, the happiness you have will be taken away.

Many of these tips and philosophies try to show you how to fake happiness and contentment. For example:


* Display Confidence *

Why not already be content with your life and where you are headed? Then, you have nothing to really worry about, and you are naturally confident.


* Smile and Make Eye Contact *

What reason do you have to NOT smile and look in the eyes of a person you find attractive? That is where you want to look isn't it?


* Don't Supplicate *

Why do you need to do ANYTHING for this person? Don't you do everything for yourself? Why deny them the same independence?


* Be Cocky and Funny *

Why would you be into self deprecating humor? Why wouldn't you be humorous? After all you are in a happy mood.


* Be Dominant *

Don't you have any idea what you want to do? Why wouldn't you step up and voice your opinion? Why step aside and let someone else control the situation? Don't you think you are worthy enough?


Of course, you can do all these things by puffing up your ego, but then (when you get rejected hard) you will realize that it is not the way to go. You must grow up: away with the ego, away with the insecurities, away with the over-analysis, away with the haughtiness, away with the arrogance, away with the rationalization.

Let not your cocky and funny attitude come from the thought of "all chicks want me." Let not your dominance come from "I am better then everyone else." Let not your confidence come from "she failed to recognize quality." Be a real man and take things as they are.

Don't try to impress people, don't try to seduce chicks, don't try to stay strong, dominant, confident, etc.

Just try to stay happy, and all else will follow.

And let no one cramp your style.

How To Create Powerful Personal Ads (Part-3)

Subject
Remember that women looking over their emails will often sort their mail by subject, deleting uninteresting-looking messages without even bothering to read them. Make that subject line something she'll probably find interesting. It's best to make sure it relates somehow to what she'd posted earlier. Show her you really read her posts and what she had to say. Keep it short; make it witty when you can. Never poke fun until you've come to know her reasonably well (at least wait until you've written her for a while, and she's come to know when you're being sarcastic). In other words, use your head.

Length
Ever been in a conversation when someone's made a very good point, but then they begin rambling about things that have nothing to do with the topic at hand? How often have you wished the whole thing were on videotape, so you could just stop listening and go on to the next thing without wasting any more of your time on what has become bunch of fluffy nonsense? With email the recipient can (and probably will) just go on to the next message.

Try to limit your post to 1-2 screens of text. Failing that, make sure you tell only as much as you feel you must to get your point across, nothing more. Stay on topic, then end. Remember, you don't have a captive audience.

Line Length
A nice little thing to remember is that not all computers handle messages in the same way. Messages that may look perfect on your screen may well arrive completely jumbled on someone else's. You can avoid this by limiting the length of your lines to no more than 65 characters. If your email program doesn't automatically wrap the text, no problem; just press 'return' after about every 10 words to make sure your lines are short enough.

Paragraphs
Try to skip lines between paragraphs and limit yourself to 5-10 lines per paragraph. The extra space is easier on your readers' eyes, and your text will have more impact.

Quoting
It's sometimes necessary to quote a section of text from a previous message the person on the other end sent you, as a reference for your response. Be sure to quote accurately, or you may hear complaints. Quote only as much text as necessary to make your point.

Tone
Perhaps the single most important aspect of good email writing. Make sure the tone fits the woman you're writing to. Remember, there really is a living person on the other end. Remembering this simple fact will help you accomplish what you wish with whomever your recipient happens to be. Think about your readers and tell them only what they need to know in order to understand you. If you're worried about style, write principally about those things that truly interest you. Keep everything short and crisp. Above all, write simply and honestly; if it wouldn't sound right coming out of your mouth, you probably shouldn't send it.

Why Very Intelligent Men Fail With Women

I've been teaching men how to become more successful with women and dating for a several years now... and one "problem scenario" just keeps coming up OVER AND OVER... and OVER
and OVER and OVER again...

...and it's really amazes me.

I'm going to refer to it as "The Genius Failure Paradox".

"The Genius Failure Paradox" is the tendency for UNUSUALLY intelligent men to have very LOW levels of success with women and dating.

After contemplating this particular paradox, discussing it, and working on it for an awesome amount of time, I'd like to share my thoughts about it with you.

I assume that if you've read this far, then you see probably yourself as smarter than the average guy.

You know that you're a little different than other guys.

You probably realized at a young age that you saw things differently, and thought differently than others in school...

And you've probably realized that your smart mind gives you an advantage over others in many areas of life...

Your smart mind gives you a particular type of advantage that can be very, very powerful in life: YOU'RE USUALLY RIGHT.

Smart people get used to being "right", because they usually ARE right.

And when you're RIGHT more often than others, you can get ahead in many situations.

But unfortunately, this smart mind of yours can actually be WORSE than USELESS when it comes to a key area of life:

WOMEN AND DATING.

By the way, I did say WORSE than useless.

It can actually be like having a hammer when you need to tighten a bolt. If you use the tool you have for the job, you'll most likely make the situation WORSE.

Of course, it's hard for a smart guy to even IMAGINE a situation where his smart mind could HURT his chances for success...

But trust me, this is one of those situations.

So relax, open your smart mind, and let me share with you the ten reasons why smart guys fail with women... and what to do about it.

REASON #1: THEY'RE WRONG, BUT THEY CAN'T OR WON'T SEE IT OR ADMIT IT

I mentioned that smart guys are used to being RIGHT in most situations.

And what do most smart guys do when they come across a situation where they're WRONG?

They find a new situation... one that fits their strength. They know they'll be right next time, so they just walk away... knowing that it won't be long before they're right again.

(OR they let the "problem situation" destroy them... more on that later.)

Well, the BITCH about being wrong when it comes to women and dating is THERE'S NOWHERE TO RUN AND HIDE.

There's no quick "I'm right" around the next corner to make you feel better.

It only takes "failing" with a few women in a row for a smart guy to see the pattern... and realize that something isn't working.

Solution? Think harder.

A smart guy just assumes that his logic must be good... so he just keeps thinking harder.

But when no success comes, it really starts to become mentally difficult.

Accepting that you're wrong is a VERY hard thing for a "smart guy".

Accepting that you're not only wrong, but you have NO CLUE WHERE TO EVEN START is even more difficult.

Ultimately, many smart guys come up with the following logical conclusion:

I AM A SMART GUY, THEREFORE IF I CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN AND DATING, THEN THE PROBLEM MUST NOT BE SOLVABLE OR WORTH SOLVING.

Try that on for a self-defeating idea.

REASON #2: THEY'RE BLIND AND ARROGANT

In short, many smart guys refuse to accept that a good, solid, workable answer could come from someone "dumber" than them, so they discount any idea that comes from an "obviously less intelligent person" before trying it.

Let me ask you a question:

If you were going to be walking across Africa on foot, would you rather have your guide be the guy on this planet with the highest I.Q., or a caveman who lived a million years ago that had an I.Q. of about 50... but who grew up being chased by lions and all kinds of animals that wanted to eat him all his life?

It's an interesting question.

Now, hopefully you'd like to have the guide who isn't the smartest guy around... but who has escaped from many, many dangerous situations with deadly animals...

But now let me ask you:

If you'd like to learn how to be more successful with women and dating, would you take advice from a guy who isn't very intelligent, but who knows how to attract women?

There's something about being smart that makes some guys unwilling to accept input, ideas, or instruction from anyone who isn't either as smart or smarter than them.

Well, any SMART GUY can see the folly in this particular approach... once it's examined closely.

If you've been making this mistake, then you need to STOP IT. Stop being an arrogant bastard, and open your eyes.

Look around.

Learn from some "dumb" guys... and let them teach you how to get what you REALLY want.

REASON #3: POOR SOCIAL SKILLS

It BLOWS MY MIND how many smart guys I meet that just don't GET IT when it comes to basic social skills.

It's as if they have logically reasoned that social skills are for lower beings who need to play games... and not worth the time it would take to learn them.

In fact, I believe that there are a lot of smart guys running around this planet who don't even have "social skills" and "be a cool guy that people like" in their "MENTAL MODEL" of what it could possibly take to be successful with women and dating.

Social skills are just that... SKILLS.

They're not social INFORMATION.

They're not social THEORIES.

They're social SKILLS.

And you don't get them by THINKING about them. You get them by GETTING them.

Excellent social skills are the foundation for good communication with other humans... and if you don't have good social skills, you dramatically lower your chances for success with women.

REASON #4: THEY PSYCH THEMSELVES OUT

Smart guys do something that fascinates the hell out of me...

They come up with all the reasons why everything WON'T WORK when it comes to women and dating.

They actually figure out why what they would like to do will probably fail...

They use their amazing creative imaginations to imagine all kinds of horrible pictures and scenes... and then they use those imaginary outcomes to create negative emotions... which ultimately stop them from having success with women and dating.

THEY DON'T EVEN TRY.

Now, if you've thought something through and come up with a good reason why it would fail, it makes sense to not do it, right?

I mean, why would you want to do things that are going to fail?

It's sound logic, but HORRIBLE thinking when it comes to the REAL WORLD... and success with women.

Because smart guys don't UNDERSTAND women, and they don't UNDERSTAND what it takes to be successful with women, they are working with bad figures. They're wrong before they even start figuring!

Using your mind to come up with all the reasons why things won't work in this area of your life leads to ULTIMATE FAILURE.

You must learn to overcome this habit if you have it.

REASON #5: THEY SEEK ONLY "INFORMATIONAL SOLUTIONS"

What does a smart guy do when he runs into a problem... or he needs to figure something out?

He looks for INFORMATION to help him solve the problem.

MORE INFORMATION is always the answer.

Information is the friend of a smart guy.

Got a strange virus on your computer? Just hop on the internet and search for how to eliminate it.

Don't know how to change the alternator on your car? No prob. Just buy the manual and turn to page 147.

Don't know the definition of a word? Open up your dictionary.

MORE INFORMATION solves the problem.

So what do smart guys do when it comes to overcoming a problem with women?

They want MORE INFORMATION.

They think the answer lies in learning just ONE MORE TECHNIQUE... or one more magic concept.

Well what if there were a situation in life where the "get more information" strategy actually made things WORSE?

How would you even know that it was making things worse?

Now, I don't want to suggest that learning more about how to be successful with women is a bad thing. It's not.

But if you have a problem that is EMOTIONAL or PHYSICAL in nature, then reading five million theories on it probably isn't going to help you very much.

You need to get out in the real world and try some stuff!

You need to look at the REAL problem... the ROOT of the problem.

When it comes to women and dating, there's a very good chance that you have MORE than enough "information".

Smart guys often use "more information" to distract them from TAKING ACTION.

I've heard this referred to as "Creative Avoidance".

Nod silently if you've ever figured out a creative way to avoid facing something in your life.

Good, thank you.

REASON #6: THEY FOCUS ON LOGIC INSTEAD OF EMOTION

NEWS JUST IN: Women don't feel ATTRACTION for men who make them THINK.

Women feel ATTRACTION for men who make them FEEL.

So what do most smart guys do when they first meet a woman?

EXACTLY!

They get into a LOGICAL CONVERSATION.

I'm shaking my head right now...

Smart men try to engage women in LOGICAL conversations and interactions because that's where THEY feel comfortable... not knowing that they're SHOOTING THELSEVES IN THE FOOT by doing it!

Get this: A monkey sitting at a typewriter will type the collected works of Shakespeare before you will make a woman feel ATTRACTION for you by engaging her in logical conversation.

When you start a logical conversation with a woman you've just met, you are basically taking out a NEON SIGN that says "I don't get it when it comes to women" and putting it on your head.

Typical "logical" conversations include talking about work, family, school, and jobs... discussing politics, religion, weather... and anything that has to do with math, science, or INTELLIGENCE.

On the other hand, if you start talking to a woman and you say "OK, so tell me something... Why is it that all women say that they want sweet, nice guys... but they all date sexy, selfish bad boys?" (and then make fun of any answer she gives) you're having an EMOTIONAL conversation.

If you don't know what I'm talking about, keep reading. You need more help than I thought.

REASON #7: THEY'RE NOT USED TO THE CHALLENGE OF THE MOMENT

Smart people usually have time to THINK about things.

If you're taking a test, you can sit there and work out the answers.

If you have a math problem, you can work on it until you've figured it out.

If you're trying to fix something, you can keep working on it until it's fixed.

Smart guys are used to being able to take at least a LITTLE bit of time to prepare and show off their "good sides" in most situations.

Not so with women...

If you don't know what to do at every step along the way, you'll be shut down very quickly.

Women have an AMAZING "He doesn't get it" radar system.

Women have all kinds of subtle and ingenious tests that they throw at men to separate the "get its" from the "don't get its".

And if you don't get it, then you're going to fail one of these tests VERY quickly.

But the worst part is that you won't ever KNOW that you were being tested... OR that you failed.

Smart guys aren't used to dealing with complex EMOTIONAL and COMMUNICATION challenges in the moment... and especially the "women and dating" kind.

One of they keys to becoming more successful with women and dating is learning to handle all of the tests that women throw at you effortlessly.

But before you can learn how to deal with the tests, you must first learn how to communicate on an emotional level, how to demonstrate that you have fundamental social skills, and how to keep your cool in the moment.

REASON #8: THEY THINK THAT DOING "NICE" THINGS IS THE "SMART WAY"

OK, let me ask you a trick question:

If I told you that you were going to have a date with the supermodel of your choice, which of the following would you choose as a "smart" way of preparing:

1) Find out what her favorite type of flowers are, and show up with a dozen of them so she would be "wowed".

2) Learn about her favorite travel destination so you could discuss it with her.

3) Find out what her favorite type of food is so you could take her to dinner... and she could see that you cared enough to choose something that she enjoyed.

OK, time's up. Which did you choose?

Now, I already mentioned that this was a TRICK question.

The answer is NONE OF THE ABOVE.

But WHY?

These three options all seemed logical, right?

I mean, why WOULDN'T you want to show up with her favorite flowers?

Why WOULDN'T you want to talk about her favorite places to travel?

Why WOULDN'T you want to take her to eat her favorite foods so she enjoyed herself?

Go with me here...

Smart guys think that they're being CLEVER when they do things like buying a woman her favorite flowers... and bringing them to the FIRST DATE.

Right?

In their minds, they're thinking "I'm going to be the guy who is thinking ahead... and I'm going to show up with the flowers that I KNOW she loves... and she's going to see them and like me more because of it".

Makes sense... good math, right?

Well the one teensy-weensy mistake that these "smart" guys make is not realizing that it doesn't actually take a smart person to think like this!

In fact, ANY jackass can figure out how to kiss a woman's ass.

And guess what?

WOMEN KNOW THIS!

And guess what else?

EVERY WUSSBAG DOES THIS STUFF.

An intelligent guy, in his proud arrogance, will think he's being such the charmer by using this "thoughtful" approach...

...and the woman he is chasing will interpret it as just another Wussy who's trying to MANIPULATE her.

Ouch. Another blow to intelligence.

MISTAKE #9: ALWAYS NEEDING TO BE THE EXPERT

Have you ever met a smart guy who always needed to be "right"?

Have you ever met someone who would actually argue with you about something they knew nothing about... and make a fool of themselves because they just couldn't shut their "smart mouths"?

Over the last few years helping guys improve their success with women, I see this one pattern over and over again...

Smart guys don't like to be "beginners" at ANYTHING.

They don't like the idea of screwing up... especially if others are watching.

They want to maintain this "smart guy" image of themselves... so they try to always be "The Expert" at whatever they do.

Instead of saying "Hey, you know what? I'm a beginner at this... how do I do it? What should I do first? What next?"... and instead of being totally OK with screwing up, making mistakes, and making a fool of themselves in front of others in order to LEARN...

...they won't risk embarrassment, failure, or others thinking that they're beginners... so they wind up ultimately FAILING.

MORE NEWS JUST IN: It's OK to be a beginner.

MISTAKE #10: THEY CAN'T DEAL WITH FEAR AND OTHER EMOTIONS

A smart guy's STRENGTH is his MIND.

His WEAKNESS is often his EMOTIONS.

Smart guys are often IMMOBILIZED by FEAR.

Totally stopped.

FROZEN.

And since many smart guys aren't comfortable dealing with things they're not good at, they just repress or RUN away from fear.

Many men would rather DIE in lonely isolation than admit that they don't know how to deal with their emotions... or, GODFORBID, ask for help!

Hey, I went for YEARS like this.

I know what it's like.

But the reality is that any guy can learn to handle and even MASTER his emotions (even fear)... if he just takes the time and effort to learn HOW to do it.

If this is you, then do yourself a big favor... take the time. Take the effort.

Don't worry about what anyone else thinks of you... it doesn't matter.

What matters is you doing the things that YOU need to do FOR YOU.