In the next chapter, I’m going to describe MY particular unique personality and the ‘character’ that I become when I’m meeting women.
But before I do that, I’d like to talk about some of the different personality traits that women find most attractive. Some are better when used with others, and some don’t work well together. Here is the list with brief descriptions. I’ll talk more about combining these later.
adultfriendfinder registration Funny. Humour is just plain powerful with women. If you can keep her laughing, you will go far.
Intelligent and Creative. Intelligence is sexy IF it’s used in a way that’s interesting to her. Use your creativity and intelligence to surprise her with ideas, fantasies, and unexpected things that charm her.
Educated. Education is attractive to women as long as it’s used in an interesting way. Some women are actually intimidated by education, which usually works in your favor.
Classy and Cultured. If you have class, women pick up on it. Do your shoes and belt match? Do you understand interior design and color contrast? Do you know about different types of wine? Do you like foreign movies? Do you understand fashion? Do you like Frank Sinatra? Do you enjoy exotic foods? Do you serve her Hors d’oeuvres and a glass of wine when she visits? Do you open all doors for her? Women notice this stuff BIG TIME.
Dominant. Women have an unconscious attraction to dominant men. The dominant males in some primate groups account for up to 75% of all the matings, while the less dominant males go without any. Same goes for humans.
Thoughtful. Women don’t just like gifts; they like knowing that you were THINKING of them. The gift is a SYMBOL. Women feel the same amount of good inside whether it’s a card or a diamond (of course, the diamond lasts longer, so there are more ‘times of feeling good’!). But the fact is that women like to know that you’re thinking about them. Even if you’re telling a woman that you don’t like it that she was out with another guy, she’ll like it because it means you were thinking about her!
Notices Significant Details. Women don’t just notice details; they USE them to try to be attractive and attentive. If she is wearing a sexy outfit, she didn’t put it on by accident. If her hair is done nicely, it wasn’t a fluke. Women are very impressed and attracted to men who notice these details.
Unpredictable/Predictable. Here’s a paradox. Women are drawn to men who they can’t control or predict. They obsess over guys who flirt, give them attention, and then don’t call the next day. Predictability is only attractive when it comes to choosing a HUSBAND. Then a woman usually wants a man who’s VERY predictable.
Enthusiastic, Fun, Happy. Nothing is a bigger turn-off than a killjoy. Some men get upset and pout when a woman is happy and try to put down the things that she enjoys to sound superior, which is usually a HUGE mistake. Enthusiasm is infectious and attractive.
Adventurous. Women are instantly attracted to men who like to do extreme, adventurous, unusual, and even dangerous things. It’s exciting. Adventurism is sexy.
Aggressive. Women love men that know what they want and go after it. Passion is a sign of life. I’m not talking about the kind of aggressive that turns into date rape. I’m talking about the kind of aggressive that turns into setting a goal and then going after it with passion and getting it no matter what.
Confident/Cocky. Women are magnetically attracted to men who are just a little bit too cocky. Just a little bit. This is a tough one to explain. Many men take this to mean ‘overly arrogant’, which is not what I mean. If you watch Pierce Brosnan in ‘The Thomas Crown Affair’, Clarke Gable in ‘Gone With The Wind’, or Tom Cruise in ‘Top Gun’, you’ll get an idea of what I’m talking about. The confident/cocky trait is mild overconfidence combined with humour. Drives women wild.
Expertise. If you’re an expert in an area that is interesting to your kind of woman, this can be attractive. It needs to be presented from a “I know a lot about this, let me show you” perspective and not a “I’m cool and you’re not” angle.
Attention. Women like attention. And interestingly enough, it’s better to hint at the attention that you’re giving them than to be too overt about it. If you say, “I was thinking about you earlier today, and I just wanted to mention that I really like the sound of your voice...” it’s much more powerful than listening to them complain about something so they think you’re paying attention. Get it?
Disinterest, Indifference, a Challenge. Most women are used to being pursued by men in one way or another. If you are indifferent to a woman, make her think that you’re only calling because you’re bored and act almost disinterested sexually, they’ll often do their very best to get your attention. Different is good in this case. Again, this drives most women crazy, and even though they’d hate to admit it, it’s ultra interesting to them.
Charm (attention with a polished, smooth approach). This is hard to describe. Watch a James Bond movie to get an idea. And watch ‘Dirty Rotten Scoundrels’. Pay attention to Michael Caine’s character. Charm is powerful because it has a certain ‘prince on a white horse’ aspect to it.
Romantic Imagination and Perspective. Watch the movie ‘Don Juan DeMarco’ and listen to how Don Juan interprets the world. Instead of just looking at the surface of a woman, he looks within her to find the beautiful part. A romantic imagination sees opportunities for poetic comments, interesting stories, fascinating history, and emotional interpretation in everything.
Expert in Body Language. This is important, as women are constantly sending signals. I’ll talk more about this in a later chapter.
Sexual Mastery. Women love sex just as much as men do. But just like everything else in life, a great lover is not easy to find. Women become instantly addicted to skillful lovers who know how to make them feel ecstasy and teach them new ways of feeling incredible.
Every woman is slightly different. There is no one magic system to which every woman responds. If what you’re doing doesn’t work, don’t throw out the system...
try it on a different woman.
The most successful men I know will tell you that they are only successful because they are able to accept ‘no’ and not take it personally. Again, unsuccessful men take a ‘rejection’ as a personal assault on their inner child. Don’t make this mistake.
So start right now. Take a moment and describe the type of woman you’d like to attract and write down the qualities that you think will attract her. Then go to work cultivating these qualities.
The idea is to create your own winning combination and then find a place to use it that offers the best chances for success. You want to come across as interesting, unique, original, and desirable.
By the way, if you don’t know what the women who you’re interested in are attracted to, ASK! That’s right, just walk up to them whenever you see one and say, “Can I ask you a question? I’m sure that you’re probably in a relationship right now, but will you tell me something... I want to know what it is that attracts a woman like you to a man. What do you look for?”
You’ll find that most of the women you pose this question to will be glad to tell you. As a matter of fact, you’ll even find that some will help you in other ways if you ask. They’ll go shopping with you, help you decorate your house, help you choose a hairstyle... everything.
But most guys are afraid to ask, or they feel like a puss because they are asking a woman for help. Do yourself a favor. If you are having trouble, get help. Women are amazingly generous when they are helping a man get his ‘attractiveness’ together.