Should You Make Your Relationship Facebook Official?

There comes a time in your adult dating relationship when you will have to make a vital decision: Do you change your ‘single’ status on Facebook from to ‘in a relationship’ or do you take it off entirely? Decisions…Decisions.

It seems like such a tedious thing to be putting so much thought into but the truth is there are a lot of potential dating woes that can come with the stress of making your relationship official on Facebook.

First of all, the conversation is awkward as all hell. Asking if you can put your relationship on Facebook will make you sound like the neediest person on the planet. Also, when you oblige their wishes, they automatically think you are cheating. Goddamn Facebook.

Now that you’ve put it out there for all to see, you have to now worry about displaying the proper Facebook girlfriend etiquette. You have to determine how many times is appropriate to post on your partner’s wall and if you’re showing affection towards them online. You have to answer annoying emails from ex boyfriends “congratulating” your new relationship and if you have to limit the amount of friends of the opposite sex you add to your profile. It can be overly exhausting.

And let’s not forget to mention the number one reason you should fear making your relationship official over Facebook: The Facebook Breakup. When you break up and your partner takes you off as their relationship status, everybody gets to see that you broke up and better yet, you have the privilege of seeing all the girls on your now ex’s newsfeed liking and commenting on their new single status. All because you had to announce your relationship over Facebook.

Save yourself the trouble and avoid putting it up. Changing your status from to ‘single’ to ‘in a relationship’ shouldn’t declare how much you love someone.

The Best Sex Positions For Mind Blowing Orgasms

Do perfect sex positions actually exist? The answer is yes! Take your time to find the best angles for both you and your e mistakes couples make using sex positions: There are hundreds of sex positions, but the reality is that there are maybe only eight basic positions, with slight variations for each. So, what happens when you’ve tried all eight positions? You need to explore all aspects of sexuality about eachother. Cultivate an adventurous spirit, turn foreplay into a game, add a prop or two.

There are literally hundreds of ways you can make your lovemaking more exciting, passionate and fulfilling, rather than just trying new sex positions. And we all know how important sex is in the adult dating world.

Never Follow In Madonna's Footsteps

The older Madonna gets, the younger her suitors get in her adult dating life. Recently, the elder material girl was seen getting fresh with her twenty-four year old back up dancer Brahim Zaibat in the Hamptons.

I know Demi Moore and shows like Cougar Town (seriously, change that name of that show already) have exploited the wonderful sex lives of cougar women, however Madonna is no one to follow because her track record with hooking up with younger men is not impressive. Lets take a look at her boy toy track record, shall we?

Vanilla Ice

Remember when Vanilla Ice was still relevant? No? Well, back in 1992, Vanilla Ice was apparently the sh*t. Madonna was ten years older than him and they met while doing her infamous SEX coffee table book. Dating this “baby” only brought in the jealous streak in her.

Carlos Leon

Remember this Latin cutie? How can you forget since he fathered Madonna’s ambitious child, Lourdes? This relationship lasted three years and they ended up breaking up when Madonna was pregnant. Classy move Carlos.

Tupac Shakur

Madonna had a brief fling with the late rapper months before he was gunned down on a Las Vegas strip. This short-lived relationship ended when she apparently wanted him to be her “baby daddy.” The number one way to scare off a guy in my opinion.

Guy Ritchie

Everybody thought Madonna had broken her boy toy curse when she married famed director Guy Ritchie. (Who is ten years younger than her.) Unfortunately, after eight years of marriage, they called it quits and now down right hate each other.

A-Rod

I think everybody knows what happened here. Apparently, A-Rod likes his women blonde, aging and desperate.

Jesus Luz

Remember when Madonna starting dating this 22 year old zygote? They apparently ended their 10 month affair after discovering they had nothing in common. Gee, you don’t say?

In closing, Lady Madge proves to be no icon when it comes to hooking up with younger men. Keep your options open but don’t go after young men just because you can. It may hurt your love life in the long run.

Fun & Not-so-Fun Sex Fetishes

Oh, sexual fetishes….How are you, my friends? Have you been scaring people lately? Or have you been turning them on? How many men and women have been letting you out of the closets they make out of their rib cages? And how many have been keeping you in?

In my many years of adult dating, I have been surprised by several of my partner’s fetishes, some of which I tolerated or adored, some of which I didn’t. Here are a list of some of the fetishes I have come across; after all, if you’re into sex dating, it’s always good to get familiar with some of the weirder XXX stuff some people like to get into.

Odaxelagnia: Getting bit. Biting. Yeah, it’s a pretty regular thing. Hell, I love when a woman bites me, and I don’t mind doing a little nibble myself, but if you can’t get off without biting, THAT is when it is considered a fetish.

Dacryphilia: People who get hot for tears – yes, tears. As in, she’s crying and you’re as hard as can be. Hmmm. A tad creepy.

Pognophilia: Obsession with bearded men. I love this one! I have a beard, you see. Lots of women love grabbing at it during a make out session, even love the feel of it on their thighs, say it makes me look like a real man…whatever that means, I don’t even think they know….

That’s today’s fetish list. Any of you ever got so turned off by someone’s fetish you stopped dating them?

A Sex Strike Can Reignite Passion

I know what you thinking: How can withdrawing from sex possibly help your adult dating life? Once you are in a committed relationship, the anticipation and yearnings start to fade after a while. You know every thrust timed down to a millisecond and the orchestrated orgasm moans start to sound as familiar as a laugh track on a Friends episode.

You can read all the Cosmo magazines you want, but the only way to truly reignite the spark in a monogamous relationship is to simply refrain from doing it for a short amount of time that is.

To do this, set a sex strike date to your relationship and inform your partner that the metaphorical chastity belt is going on for at least a week. In this week, you must test your limits and find ways on how not to give into temptation and here are some fun ways on how to do so:

1. Talk About Sex

Just because your loins are on lockdown, doesn’t mean your lips have to be. Leave your significant other dirty and explicit notes and texts on how much you can’t wait for the expiry date of your sex strike and them what you plan on doing to them in the near future. Tease your partner by calling them in the middle of the day and reassure them that you plan on keeping your sexual promises to them. By keeping your mind engaged, your bodies will be aching for each other like it was the first time again.

2.Take Time To “Love” Yourself

Bring out the AA batteries and hand lotion because during this week, it’s imperative you take care of yourself. You won’t be re-igniting the spark if you only last two seconds in bed after a lengthy sex strike, so take this time out to engage in some fairly arousing solo play. Do things you wouldn’t normally do. Watch some racy adult films and experiment by buying a new vibrating toy. Make sure your partner knows what you’re doing so they can feel guilt-free from taking care of themselves as well.

3.Bone Up On Your Studies

Take this time off to do some extra xxx credit at home by going to your local bookstore and reading erotic books on sex positions, Kama sutra and the art of Tantra. You can even take a class or workshop to help improve your skills as a lover. Practice makes perfect and when your sex strike is off, you can surprise your partner with everything that you learned.

If you do everything on this list, then your sex strike will only be full of rewards and your sex life should be right on track again! Good luck!

Are Twihards Really Just Horny Bastards?

Being a genuine horror fan, I particularly loathe the Twilight series. I have nothing against the actors or the directors but I really just have a problem with the deluded message it sends to young teenage girls and bored housewives all around the world about adult dating relationships.

As everybody knows, (whether you want to or not) part one of the final chapter in the series is coming to theatres in a few months and twihards are getting wet excited as each day passes. However, more fans are not as excited to see the wedding, but rather they are looking forward to the infamous sex scene where Bella and Edward fuck consummate their marriage.

This week at the annual San Diego Comic-Con, thousands of female fans were squealing with orgasmic delight while they camped out and were hopeful to see Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson’s dick love scene on the big screen.

I hate to disappoint you Twihards, but because the fan base for this series is unreasonably vast, (seriously, how can grown women like this crap?) you will not be seeing the porn love scene you have fantasized about and jilled off to numerous times after reading the ravenous scene in the Breaking Dawn novel. Don’t be surprised to just see PG-13 soap opera-worthy orgasmic faces and Edward’s naked back and sepia-colored overtones. Doesn’t that sound so hot? Not to me!

What you see is what you get!

Personally, I have no idea what the fuss is all about. Bella literally gets knocked up shortly after the first time and then Edward has to rip the baby out of her with his fangs. If that is not an advertisement for abstinence, I don’t know what is.

So I have come to the conclusion that all twihards are really just horny bastards who will need to stock up on AA batteries because they will be severely disappointed after the lack of nudity and sex in Breaking Dawn.

The Beginning of the End, Or the End of the Beginning

Once you’ve figured out how to attract women, you’re bound to find one who’s particularly interesting to you.

One that you might actually, um, love.

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One that you might want to keep around for a bit. Hey, you might even meet someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Even though I’ve made most of this book about meeting women, I don’t feel that it would be complete without at least a few ideas on how to keep a woman attracted to you for the long haul.

But first of all, here’s my take on why relationships fail:

When you first start dating someone you really like, the body releases a combination of chemicals that are quite literally intoxicating. These chemicals cause you to want to be with that person all the time, stay up all night talking to them, and have sex with them three times a day.

But twelve to eighteen months later, the chemicals change. The intoxicating chemicals are replaced by ‘stability’ chemicals. The ‘stay-up-all-night-can’t-be-away-from-her-have-sex-three-times-a-day’ feeling goes away and the ‘let’s-settle-down-and-have-two-kids-and-buy-a-minivan’ chemicals take over. Deal with it. (If you want to understand this process better, read “The Alchemy of Love and Lust” by Theresa Crenshaw.)

So now that you know this, how do you keep this whole thing from turning into an episode of “All in the Family”?

Well, the short answer is, keep up the fun, interesting, unpredictable behaviour. Notice the details. Do thoughtful things.

Here’s something that I’ve learned in life: If you want to get back more than you give, then play the stock market. It’s not gonna happen in relationships. In fact, if you want to get a lot back, you’re probably going to have to give even more.

Most people are selfish and say, “I’m not going to give more than I get.” But instead of getting a lot, all they get is old and unhappy. I’ve found that it’s much better to give a ton and get back a lot in return, not caring about the fact that I didn’t get as much as I gave than to give little or none and get back little or none.

Relationships aren’t like investing. If you want a lot, get used to giving more. But it’s worth it in the end, because love, attention, humour, and fun aren’t like money. If you give them out, you don’t have less. You have MORE. Get it?

Now that you’ve read this book, you probably have that same feeling that I had when I first learned all of this amazing material. You’re probably excited.

Well, there’s more.

If you are ready to take your education to the next level and advance at a faster pace, then you need to listen to, read, and watch my other programs. They take this foundation and expand the concepts both wide and deep... and show you tricks and shortcuts for everything from approaching women to taking things to a physical level.

Two Ways Women Think About Men And How You Can Control

This I believe that women see men with whom they get involved as either ‘long-term relationship’ material or ‘sex’ material. You have to make the choice about which category you’d like to be in. By the way, if you get involved sexually, you can usually extend that for as long as you’d like.

If, on the other hand, you don’t get involved sexually but you still buy her dinner, call her all the time, and pursue her, there’s a good chance that you’ll NEVER get involved with her sexually.

Many, if not most guys, think that if they play the dating game that they’ll wind up ‘getting some’ eventually. This just isn’t so. I’ve met so many women who say, “Well, I have this guy that I let buy me things and take me out, and I have this other one that’s my sex toy.”

Now, admittedly this isn’t all women. But believe me when I tell you that if you get on the ‘friendship’ program, you’re very likely to stay there. And the friendship road is

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paved with gifts and dinners.

Trust me. If you do too many things for her, you’re going to spend a lot of time and $$$ and most likely never wind up with anything to show for it other than a curious dry feeling just below your abdomen.

For the record, I really do like e-mail communication better than phone communication. I get probably 4 out of 5 women that I e-mail to write back, as opposed to maybe 1 out of 2 or 3 calls returned the first time.

I write and say, “Hey, it was nice meeting you last night… what are you up to this week? Would you like to join me for a cup of something wonderful and some stimulating conversation? Talk to me.”

If they don’t answer that one, I write back a couple of days later with, “What, playing hard to get already? Nice. Talk to me.”

I get most of them e-mailing me back by this point.

When they do, I say, “What’s your # and when’s a good time to reach you?”

Now, here’s why I do this… Duh! When I e-mail them, for some reason they feel like we’re friends because we’ve e-mailed back and forth… don’t ask me to explain it… it’s taken me two and a half years to figure it out.

They also return your calls after you’ve e-mailed them a couple of times… again, don’t ask me why, some freaky chick thing.

OK… so now I’m on the phone with them (either because I’ve e-mailed them, or because I just got a number and called). I want to get together with them for about 30 minutes and see what they’re like as a person and decide if they’re someone who I’d like to know better.

I’ll tell them that I was about to go do something (to remind myself and let them know that I have a life) and then say, “Well, let’s see… what’s your schedule for the next few days? (I choose a time based on her reply…) Why don’t we get together tomorrow at about four. Do you know where the blah blah blah coffee shop is? Great… if we get along, then maybe we can go for a bite to eat… but you know, coffee is a safe bet… this way, if you’re scary in person, I can say, “Oh, hey… um… I just remembered that I have to go floss my cat… it’s really important…” and then we can call it a night.”

This makes them laugh, but it also gets them thinking, “Who the hell is this guy to be qualifying me?” which is perfect.

Next, I tell them, “The coffee place is close to my house so why don’t you just meet me at my place, ring the bell, and I’ll come out and we can go… this way if you’re a few minutes early or late, I don’t have to be waiting.” (I got this idea from a friend of mine.)

Then I say, “Now, let me ask you this… what are the chances that you’re not going to show up tomorrow? <Let her answer> Because one of my pet peeves is people that are late or flaky. I can deal with a lot of things, but I’m always on time where I say I’m going to be, and I never have an excuse or don’t show up… so I just wanted to make sure… because if there’s one thing that could end our friendship before it starts, it’s flakiness.” This sets the right tone for flaking, as you can see.

***HERE COMES THE KILLER!

Next, when we’re getting ready to hang up, I say something like, “Great, it’s going to be nice to get to know you better. And if nothing else, we can just be FRIENDS.”

It’s taken me and a good friend of mine a long time to get this piece. From here on out, I constantly drop hints about just ‘being friends’ and how I really ‘like her as a friend’ and how ‘it’s nice to meet someone that I like as a friend’.

Trust me on this one… this messes them up soooooo hard that they literally don’t know what to do.

This is most likely the first time IN THEIR ENTIRE LIFE that this has happened to them. It continually triggers their insecurity and makes them wonder why

they’re not attractive enough to you. It also disarms them completely. (You have to really possess the mindset that you are qualifying them and that they’re going to be your friend for this to work)

I personally like to use the friendship jargon because I have decided that it’s better to enter any new relationship in a ‘NOT NEEDY’ frame of mind. Talking about being friends reminds ME to pay more attention and to remember that I don’t need anything and to stay focused on learning.

The Dark Side Of Beauty

Underneath all of the beauty, most of these powerful women have a ‘shadow’ or dark side.

This dark side is secretly wanting a man who is in control of himself, his reality, and them.

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But they’d never admit it – often not even to themselves.  But their unconscious knows and recognizes this desire as something that they want. They also hold a kind of inner CONTEMPT for the weak people (especially men) who give them everything they want, as is evidenced by the “Oh, he’s just a guy I use to buy me things and “He’s my ‘Boytoy’ kind of comments that women often make to their girlfriends.

On the topic of men giving gifts to women and buying them things: Many women will take what is available to them (even if they have to do a little manipulation for it), but they will ultimately resent and disrespect a man who gives too much to them.

As a matter of fact, to most hot women, THEIR REALITY is that men kiss up to them and give them what they ask for or demand (worst case, they have to get upset or act bitchy to get their way). AGAIN, THIS IS THEIR REALITY. Men who don’t fit this mold are often just tuned out as if they didn’t exist in order to keep this reality as pure as possible for them.

(Also, I think that many women harbor contempt for their beauty. At a shadow level, they are kept from living a real life and being closer to the real world simply because fewer and fewer people can relate to them in proportion to how ‘beautiful’ they are and make themselves. Addressing this topic when speaking to women is VERY powerful. More later.)

Men are often behaving like ass kissers because they are afraid that a woman might get upset and leave. The fact is that by acting this way, a woman is MORE likely to leave. It’s one of those paradoxes that’s a self-fulfilling prophesy. If a woman whines, a man might begin to think, “Oh, no... I need to kiss her ass or she might leave. Even though she’s being ridiculous, I have to go along with it...”

This is bad for her, for you, and for the relationship between you. Learn to never let a woman act like a Bratwithout you calling her on it (AND IN A COOL, ALMOST

INDIFFERENT WAY!)

This is very counter-intuitive, but again, we’re dealing with female human behaviour, which has roots and drives that are complex and often difficult to trace.

The solution is to NOT kiss ass or do things for them like everyone else. Be different. Expect them to pull their own weight, call them on all of their issues and messed-up behaviours just like you would a guy friend or family member (Use the same “you’re my friend and I’m saying this for your benefit” tone that you’d use with a friend), tease and make fun of their insecurities in a playful way, reframe other men who kiss their ass, and put beauty in a new light (as a curse, etc., how she can never have anyone see her for who she truly is, how every man she knows would sleep with her in a minute, and how it often leads to less inner fulfillment).

The fact is that women will sleep with rich men who kiss their asses and model-handsome guys who don’t treat them well to satisfy their PHYSICAL drives.

But overall, an average looking man who takes good care of himself and makes enough money to live comfortably who is cocky, direct, challenging, confident, funny, and in control - one who challenges her constantly and never kisses her ass EVER - will be FAR more fulfilling to a beautiful woman than the other types.

This difference is not only interesting to her, but it’s also challenging as well (something she doesn’t experience often). A man who does such will not only be able to win her body, but also her interest and fascination. It will also keep her messed up behaviours more in check while allowing you to stay more in control of the situation.

***Note: If any of this stuff sounds too far out for you, I recommend that you go out to a mall and find yourself a few really beautiful women. Then ask them to read the last few pages of this book and to tell you the accuracy of this material. If you’re a doubter, you won’t believe the responses you’ll get. I’ve asked many beautiful women about these ideas and almost EVERY ONE OF THEM has told me that this line of thinking is accurate.

You’ll also notice out in the real world that some fortunate men have the looks, fame, personality, or whatever that causes women to act naturally open and receptive to them.

If you’re one of these men, then congrats to you!

If you’re not one of these men (I’m not, so I understand what it’s like) then you have to LEARN how to get inside of a woman’s mind and heart and CAUSE her to start acting this way toward you. It may take a few minutes of conversation, or even up to an hour or so... but if you learn the skills that I’m going to teach you, you can learn how to cause women to act this way toward you, too.

Remember, attraction has different roads that lead to it. Some are easy shortcuts, but some take a little longer, present more challenges, and require more skill. But there is a structure to the process and if you learn that structure, you will be more successful.

The First Shift In Thinking

So let’s start off with this shift in thinking: Think about what the woman who you’re interested in needs and wants and don’t assume that these are the same things that YOU need and want.

And don’t assume that what women want is going to make any sense at all to you, because it probably won’t. This shift in thinking was a big one for me personally to understand. Almost none of what I do to be successful with women makes any sense to me logically, because I’m not a woman. But now that I see that what I do works over and over again, I realize that it doesn’t matter what makes sense.

All that matters is WHAT WORKS.

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Let’s get a little deeper into the female heart and mind. Females select males most of the time in nature... and in modern human courtship. And even if the man selects the woman, many if not most women still harbour the secret fantasy that they’re ‘letting him do it’, etc.

Sooooooo.... It’s good to address this issue and point out when talking to women (even if you hint at it and talk about past experiences to make the point) that you are

This kind of thing is the selector and not the selectee. very powerful, as it does one of my favourite things: It points out something to the woman that she’s most likely NEVER HEARD FROM A MAN IN HER ENTIFE LIFE. I specialize in saying things that women have never heard. I also like to say things that she’s never heard that MAKE ME DIFFERENT IN A DESIRABLE WAY.

I even say to women, “I’m about to tell you something (or something about you) that no one has ever told you...” This really gets a woman on the edge of her seat and puts her into an instant state of attention (when done in a context that makes sense). And if the thing you tell them is profound enough, they’ll begin to see you as a sort of super psychic powerhouse (women are fascinated by these kinds of insights).

My personal view is that if you help people to have profound realizations, they’ll see you as a guru rather than seeing the information or themselves as powerful. It doesn’t matter from where the info came, as long as it’s something that the person has never really thought about in that way (that’s also profound to her).

One good example is to say to a hot woman who’s acting arrogant, “You don’t have me fooled for a minute, dear.”

When she says, “What are you talking about?”, you say, “Well, I know that most men fall for this ‘I’m beautiful and aloof and I get my way’ part of your personality... but I know something that none of them know... that there’s really another side of you. A side that none of THEM get to see. I’ll bet you a dollar right now that I know something about you that no one who’s only known you for 5 minutes has EVER known... <pause, pause, pause>... You may act tough, but you’re actually EXTREMELY sensitive on the inside. If someone makes a negative comment to you, you might act like it doesn’t bother you... but you’ll think about it all the way home... I know that secretly you’re as sensitive as a little girl... it’s just that most people never get to meet that part of you...”

This messes up a cold woman soooo hard that you have to be ready for instant personality meltdown and a completely different person to come out of her.

At this point, it’s often easy to start talking about the whole pick-up scene and how women play men, etc. to let her know that you’re an insider and not falling for her game. If you drop two or three more profound comments during this time, you’ll have a woman who won’t leave you alone (but keep acting like you want to be left alone so she’ll stay after you!). Nice.

On Looks and Body Language

Most of the men I talk to who want to learn how to be successful with women ask me things like, “What’s a good line?” or “What do you say when they say this?”

For some reason, most people forget that language is a SECONDARY way of communicating. It’s to be used when there’s no faster way.

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When two people are communicating face-to-face, most of the communication is happening through body language and voice tone, while very little through the

actual words.

I’ve seen studies that show that as little as 7% of what you communicate is done verbally, while your body language and voice tone make up the other 93%.

So which do you think is more powerful when dealing with women?

Right, right... your body language and voice tone.

On Testing

The way I see it, women are constantly testing men. They do it by acting bratty, making demands, complaining, commanding, being emotional, etc.

Know what I’m talking about?

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Here’s what I do:

When a woman tries to test me – for instance, if she says, “I don’t like that heavy metal that you were listening to” – I turn it up a notch and send it back to her – I might also say, “Well, then you might want to not get in my car anymore, because it’s all I’m going to play now that you’re whining about it.” (Said in a half serious tone so she can’t tell if I’m kidding)

This sends the message that if she tries to act controlling, I’m just going to turn whatever she’s being a pain about up one notch and give it to her again. Women

get the message loud and clear when you act this way.

It may be hard to believe, but I’ve heard MANY women say things like, “I HATE IT when a man does what I tell him to do”, or “I just walk all over him, and it’s so annoying to me.”

Some women actually have standard tests that they give to new guys to see if the guy will do what they tell him to do. I’ve now learned NEVER to accept demanding or controlling behaviour. I usually just laugh and say, “Cute.” By laughing and saying, “Cute”, I short-circuit their testing mechanism and let them know that I’m going to be more of a challenge than they thought.

Snappy Responses To Common Situations

Ever been sitting with a group of attractive women and your buddies when out of nowhere one of the women says, “You guys are lucky to be at the same table with

us.”

Well I have. So I came up with a few zingers to throw out should this happen again:

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Also, quit EXPECTING to “pick up girls” and instead go make friends and give the women the opportunity to get to know you. A couple more ideas for different situations:

(The napkin almost always comes back, and the game is on... It’s fun, mysterious, and the girl always wants to know who’s playing with her. I’ve used this before, and it’s great fun. At some point, depending on whether you’re winning or losing, you can come over to her table and say something like, “Well, I had to meet my worthy opponent” or “I hope you talk better than you play”, etc.)

One of the most amazing things you can do when a woman brings up sex is to tease her about it, ask her why she’s bringing it up, and accuse her of having a dirty mind, etc. It’s great! You must realize that this is one of the very best ways to tease an attractive woman. They usually love it.  Attractive women often bring up the topic to see if you’re comfortable... or to test you to find out if you’ll get nervous or insecure.

The best thing to do in these situations is to accuse her of trying to get sexual too fast, tell her you’re not interested, and bust on her. It’s all kinds of good fun. And the added benefit is that it makes her more and more curious about you and why you don’t seem like all the other losers who roll over and act stupid.

Where And How To Meet Women

I intuitively determined that there are certain major steps to ‘meeting women’, if you will. This is how my mind naturally thinks.

I’ve now broken these down in my mind to chunks like ‘Approaching Women’, ‘Getting Phone Numbers’, etc. which I’ll explain here and in future chapters.

I’d like to add here that different people have different personal views regarding meeting women, ‘getting laid’, relationships, etc.

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I’m not going to try to convince you that my way is the best, but I’ll share some of my personal values with you. When I’m in a ‘relationship’ with a woman and we’ve agreed to be ‘exclusive’, then I’m faithful to that woman.

If I’m single, then I date whoever I want, whenever I want, and have no problems or hang ups with sex, seeing more than one woman at a time, etc. Some people see things differently, which is fine, but I wanted you to know where I was coming from on this issue.

By the way, the things that I’m sharing with you work whether you’re just meeting a woman or if you’ve known her for years... or even if you’ve been married forever.

And contrary to what many men think, women usually love it that you’ve taken the time to learn things like what I’m teaching you. It makes things more fun and interesting for them.

Learn A Few Cold Reading Methods

Women love things like Astrology, Tarot Cards, Palmistry, Handwriting Analysis, Psychics, and anything else you can think of that most men aren’t interested in.

Here’s what to do:

Go get the books “Handwriting Analysis” by Karen Amend, “Palm Reading: A Little Guide To Life’s Secrets” by Dennis Fairchild. and “An Introduction to Hand Reflexology” by Denise Brown. You can order all of them at Amazon.com.

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Then sit down for an evening and read them. Learn some basics about how to tell people what they’re like from studying handwriting samples, looking at their palms, feeling tension in their bodies, etc.

This stuff is ABSOLUTELY FASCINATING to women.

All you have to do is take a woman’s hand, look at it, and say, “Well, you’re a very interesting person.”

That’s it... it’s almost like magic.

After revealing to her all of her secret desires, you can move directly into your hand massage and Reflexology methods. I’m hoping that the benefits of these techniques speak for themselves.

By the way, it doesn’t hurt to know a few advanced or unusual massage moves either. So you might want to check out a couple of books on massage while you’re at it.

It All Comes Down To Your Skills

Having a problem? You need a new skill.

If you have some area of your life that isn’t working for you, you probably need a new SKILL.

I realized a few years ago that most people look at themselves and say things like, “There must be something WRONG WITH ME. I don’t know why. I just can’t do it.”

But, in fact, the problem wasn’t something ‘wrong’ with them; the problem was that they needed to learn a new skill or a set of skills.

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Meeting women comes down to SKILLS. If you’re having a problem in a particular area, get new skills to deal with it. For instance, if you have learned to meet women and get phone numbers, you might start having them flake out on you and not show up for planned meetings. Solution: A new skill. You need to learn the skill of getting women to meet you after making plans.

There are many parts to being successful with women, and they all work together. You may already know some of them, you might learn a few more from this book, but if you’re missing a key (like how and when to kiss a woman, for instance) you’ll still keep running into challenges.

Remember, if you’re having a challenge, you need a skill. So remind yourself of this idea, come back to this book to get the information, and then practice until you have the SKILL!

I began by creating self-image exercises based on NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) and Timeline Therapy, and doing them all the time. (Read “Frogs Into Princes” by Richard Bandler and John Grinder and “The Secret of Creating Your Future” by Tad James for more info.)

Here’s one exercise that’s helped me tremendously:

First, I close my eyes and imagine a picture of the person that I want to become. I imagine how I’ll be dressed, the expression on my face, how I’m standing... all the details. Then, I throw that picture up into the air and have it start raining copies of it all around me for as far as I can see... into my past and future... all around me. Exercises like these sometimes sound silly, but they help direct your mind towards the person that you want to become.

One area that I’ve studies extensively is what’s commonly called ‘internal dialogue’ or ‘self-talk’. This is simply the way that you talk to yourself inside your head.

Most people are talking to themselves all day long. But most people are talking NEGATIVELY to themselves instead of talking POSITIVELY. Negative self-talk is, in my opinion, one of the primary causes of low self-esteem, giving up, and a lack of interest in even trying.

If you tell yourself something enough times, you’ll begin to BELIEVE it. This new belief will take on a mind of its own and start creating its own self-talk.

Most people who have negative beliefs also have negative self-talk that creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. If this is you, STOP RIGHT NOW.

I may be the first person that’s ever pointed this out to you, so it might sound a little strange. Or, I might be reminding you of something you already know. In any event, make a commitment to yourself to start talking positively to yourself and to be encouraging from now on. Put it on your calendar. Send yourself e-mails. Do whatever you have to do so you remember to be nice to yourself when you talk to yourself.

If you’re one of those people that likes being negative, arguing with everything, finding why things can never work for you, and why everyone is wrong, then do me and yourself a favor and delete this book from your hard drive and e-mail me to ask for a refund. You’ve made a choice to be negative with yourself, and I’m not even interested in helping you see a better way. People who have made the choice to be negative about everything are usually playing out a drama that’s beyond what I’m interested in addressing and probably beyond the power of this book to change.

If, on the other hand, you are one of the people who is willing to give new things a try and agree to begin saying things like, “I can do something if I choose to” and “I can change if I really want to”, then I think you will be successful.

The key here is to begin taking a positive mindset and talking to yourself in a positive way.

Here’s an exercise for you to do: Take out a piece of paper and  write down all the negative thoughts you have about yourself, all the negative things you say to

yourself, and all the areas where a ‘positive’ outlook would help you. Then, start writing down positive things you can say to yourself instead and begin saying them.

Keep working on this exercise until you stop saying negative things to yourself. This could take you years like it did for me. But it’s worth it, so trust me. This one process will improve all areas of your life, so use it everywhere.

It’s also important to make mental pictures and rehearse the success that you’d like to have. As you’re going to sleep, create mental movies of yourself being successful in different kinds of situations and with different types of women. Mental rehearsal is the next best thing to actually doing something, so do it as often as you can.

If you make a mental movie of the ideal you doing the things that I’m going to teach you and review in your mind every day, you will see improvement and results. If you don’t do this part, you’ll be wondering why you can’t seem to get it right when the opportunity comes along.

Self-Image, Self-Talk, And Other Self Stuff

The way I see it, underpinning all of these outer details and techniques is your self-image, confidence, personality, and all of that other intangible stuff that takes a bit to get under control. So let me address how I got my personal self-image stuff together before I talk about what I do specifically. (By the way, this is the most important part of this book. All of my success has flowed from my attitude and confidence – not the other way around. So if you read nothing else, read this part.)

The Attitude

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When I first started out learning how to meet women, I remember that I had a feeling inside like, “I’m afraid to just walk up to a strange woman and start talking.”

I thought of all kinds of things that could go wrong.

“What if she has a boyfriend nearby who easily gets jealous and  wants to beat me up?”

“What if she says something that puts me down and makes me feel bad?”

“What if she says something to someone else about me being a loser because I tried to talk to her?”

All of these different ideas combined inside of me to give me a general fear of meeting women.

I’ve since learned that none of my worst fears would come true when meeting a new woman. I’ve met hundreds and hundreds of women over the last few years – and none (NONE!) have reacted or caused anything to happen that I couldn’t handle in the moment.

In the process I realized something very important:

No tactic works on every woman. Some women are not interested in meeting someone right now.

Some women are lesbians and have no interest in men.

Some women are happily married or in a relationship and don’t want to meet someone new right now.

Some women are angry.

Some are cold.

My guess is that in a random group of 100 women, only about 30 of them might be open to meeting someone new right now (in a romantic sense).

What this means is that 70 AREN’T interested in meeting someone new.

And of the 30 who are interested in meeting someone new, maybe only 15 are nice, friendly, happy people. Do you see where I’m going?

If you want to be successful at meeting women, you have to understand that many of the women you talk to aren’t interested. Most people take things like this PERSONALLY. Instead of just moving on to the next woman, they get all uptight and feel bad about it. I’ve now learned a better way.

I also learned something else that helped me dramatically.

I learned that women are used to being approached, flirted with, and picked up on in general by men. Even women who are what you might call ‘average’ are approached by men on a pretty regular basis. So when you’re about to approach a woman, keep in mind that it’s not like you’re going to try something that she’s never heard of before and shock her. You may not be totally comfortable yet just walking up to any woman, but she’ll be relatively OK with it.

And remember, if she’s not interested, it’s most likely that she’s not interested in anyone right now. Of course it’s true that she might not be interested in your ‘type’ or

you may have acted in a way that she didn’t like, but the fact is that no matter what happens, you’ll find that it’s no big deal.

Just move on.

When I first started my journey, I realized that some of the greatest memories that my friends and I have are when something bad happened to one of us. Looking back, we usually laugh about these things and make fun of each other and ourselves.

So I thought about it, and I realized that getting rejected really harshly by a woman would actually be a funny thing. I imagined my best friend and I saying, “Hey, remember that time when I walked up to that girl in the mall and said “Hi”, but she told me that she doesn’t date men who look like Pee Wee Herman? Ha ha ha ha...”

Think of it this way: If you get shut down really hard, just tell a couple of friends. They may not let you live it down, but at least you can laugh about it! (And if you have friends that won’t help you laugh about it, then you need some new ones.)

Another part of the attitude equation that I realized is that different women respond to different looks, personalities, etc. One woman might only like men who dress in suits and ties, while another might only like women who dress like bad boy rockers. Whatever style you develop, DON’T CHANGE IT JUST BECAUSE SOME

WOMEN DON’T LIKE IT.

The price of big success is having some people dislike you. So once you find a style that works for you, stick with it, and only change it because YOU choose to do so!

Do As Much As You Can To Improve

First, I looked at myself. I asked, “If I were the type of woman who I would like to attract (I like super hot, very intelligent women), what would make me want to be

with a man?”

So I started reading, listening to tapes, going to seminars… you name it. And I started to work on my ‘presentation’ of myself.

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I now think that it’s important to get EVERY POSSIBLE thing going for you that you can.

Here’s my take: If you have messed up teeth, for instance, that still shouldn’t prevent you from dressing well. So don’t let it.

Get a cool hair style. (It’s OK to ask a stylist what’s cool and get help on this one.)

Buy nice clothes (Don’t tell me that you don’t have the $$$. Get on eBay, or go to the Nordstrom Rack and look at the clearance items. I did it to start.). If you will do just a few key things, they won’t necessarily HELP you attract women, but they’ll get rid of things that are PREVENTING you from attracting women that you DON’T EVEN REALIZE.

Make no mistake that if you’re interested in ATTRACTIVE women, you’d better realize right now that these things make a difference. You don’t have to work out ten times a week, but get your body in at least OK shape. You don’t have to have perfect teeth, but make sure that they’re clean and your breath is great. My personal view: If you’re overweight, poorly groomed, etc., these are all things that are within your control. You should get them handled for YOURSELF. If you don’t, then I’m going to assume that you don’t have very much self-respect, in which case almost NOTHING I tell you can help.

Women notice details that most men don’t. They notice if your belt and shoes match. They notice what kinds of foods you like to eat. They notice all the details and then make assumptions about every other area of your life based on these details.

So learn what nice shoes are and how to keep them nice. Figure out how colors and clothing go together and what is cool. It’s worth it.

I wasn’t ‘cool’ when I started, but now I’ve learned how to become more so. Huge difference. (Am I saying that you can’t attract women if you wear Nike’s and have

messed up hair? No. But remember the old saying: “A blind pig can find an occasional truffle…”)

Of course, don’t overdo it.

I’ve tried the whole dressing well bit in the past to the point of looking like I’m trying too hard. Now I dress more ‘casual nice’. I wear a lot of Calvin Klein T-Shirts with black jeans and nice black shoes, etc. This look with a nice leather coat works well in almost any situation. This is a look that you can put together for a couple or few hundred bucks (for several sets).

Here’s my mindset: Keep improving all the time, even if it’s the SMALLEST DETAIL.

I noticed recently that at least once every time I go out, a girl will ask me for a light. I always just said, “I don’t smoke” or “No”. A couple weeks ago, I said “Ah-Ha” and went to the lighter store SPECIFICALLY to find the coolest lighter that anyone has ever invented. I bought this torch lighter that make a huge flame. It looks like a welding flame. So what do you think happened the first time I went out with it? Right… got asked for a light… and got a ‘wow’ reaction from her, which started a conversation.

A list of random things to improve:

Remember, women notice the details and assume you handle everything else the same way.

Getting Phone Numbers And E-mail Addresses

I’ve personally stopped focusing on just getting phone numbers. I’ve found that e-mail addresses are far better.

Let me explain.

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I perfected the art of getting phone numbers a couple of years ago. If a woman is single, I can walk up to her and get her number in about a minute. I found out later,

after working like a mad scientist on this skill, that numbers don’t equal success.

You see, women have many different reasons for giving out their phone numbers. Some love the attention of having a lot of men call them. Some like to turn guys down. Some are actually interested. But based on the universal feedback that I get from men and my personal experience, women act differently on the phone than they do in person.

When you call a woman for the first time, she’ll often start acting stand offish or even worse, just plain rude.

I’ve found that getting an e-mail address is not only easier, but it gets more positive responses later on.

It’s almost like women appreciate it that you’ve taken the time to think about what you’re going to say when you write an e-mail to them.

The other benefit of e-mail is that it can be written and answered anytime.

If you call, you have to actually reach them.

But an e-mail can be answered anytime.

And I’ve found that e-mails are answered far more often than voicemail messages.

Here’s the how-to:

After I’ve talked to a woman for about 3 or 4 minutes, I’ll often say something like, “Well, it was nice meeting you. I’m going to get back to my friends.” They usually don’t know what to do, as they’re used to guys clinging. Then, just as I’m turning to walk away… and we kind of disconnect… I turn back and say, “Hey, do you have e-

mail?”

If they say ‘yes’, I take out a pen and paper and have them write it down. (This is great, as I just treat the ‘yes’ that they give me as a ‘yes’ to get it from them as well.

And they’ve ALL gone along with it so far.) Then I say, “Write your number down there too.” I won’t go into all of it, but this move is a powerhouse. When you ask for e-mail, it’s very low risk for them… so they think, “Fine, I’ll do that”… and then when they’re already writing, I get the phone number too… which is more natural.

If they say no, then I bust on them and say, “Well, do you have electricity?” Then I say, “Well, OK then… I like e-mail better, but I’ll take your regular phone number… it’s so damn hard to reach people on the phone these days.”

I hope you get what just happened… OK, then, as they’re writing I say, “Is this a number that you actually answer?” If not, then I say, “Look, write your real number down… it’s going to be OK… I’ll only call you nine times a day.” They laugh and give me their real number.

Just realize that all you have to do is ask.

Like I said, I’ve tried all kinds of things. Many guys say, “But what do I tell her as a reason why I want her number or e-mail?” I’ve never had a woman ask me. If you ask and they give it, then she knows why you asked. If she doesn’t give it to you, then she also knew why you asked. Just assume that this is the case.

If you ask every time, and you do it in a smooth, assuming, calm way, you’ll get a lot of e-mails and phone numbers.

Note: Carry a pen with you at all times.

Be Different In An Attractive Way

By studying marketing and sales, I’ve learned that humans are attracted to things that are unique. They are also attracted to things that are superior. So I have a phrase that I use: “Different in a preferential way.” In the mating game, it pays to be different in an ATTRACTIVE way.

What I’m about to share with you is a group of ingredients. These are the different ingredients to which women are attracted. It’s up to you to take what you have and to use this list to augment your personality in such a way that it becomes attractive to the type of women with whom you’re interested. The key is to be different in an attractive way.

But make sure that you’re not too different! If you get too carried away with this idea, you’ll be outside of the realm of ‘normal’ and you will wind up hurting yourself. So experiment and test to see what works for you.

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